#i almost felt weird over having my collar tag be a moon instead of a star

[kidfur]

i gotta say tho im surprised how well my normal self adapts into a vtuber concept/design wise.. its good for vtubers (if they really care abt growth) to have a solid base concept and i already have that with "baby wish-granting angel kitty" which is almost a bit of a mouthful but the themes work really well together imo. and my design already has a solid silhouette with my big ears, fluffy hair that flows out to the sides, and my lil wingies n big tail. and if i ever decide to turn my design into a kemonomimi instead of a furry then it would still translate super well

[henrycavell]

obsession

summary: she managed to escape him for a short time, but now he had found her. word count: 2,353

pairing: august walker/unknown ofc

warnings: this is noncon smut!! if you’re not into that please do not read, i don’t want to upset or trigger anyone. also breeding.

a/n: please tell me what you think!! im so nervous. this is my first time writing smut all by myself, too, so please be nice ok love you guys thanks

tag list: @evnscvll​ @promptandpros​ @iloveyouwhiskey @crimsonrae​ @littlefreya​ @mary-ann84​ @dearlybelovedluke​ @vacant-writings​ @wondersofdreaming​ @80scavill​

Nothing had looked out of the ordinary, everything was quiet and untouched like it always was. She closed the door behind herself, locking it like she always did, setting the chain into place. Dropping her bag by the door and sliding out of her heels, she moved through the hall, already beginning to undress from that day’s work clothes. Tugging her blouse up over her head, it fell to the floor just a few feet from her bedroom door. She froze, her eyes trained on the floor where she saw loose rose petals scattered, leading further into the room. In her bedroom, strewn across her bed were multiple roses, with long stems covered in thorns. A pink card rested on top of the gray downy sheets. 

Her body ran cold, paralyzed by fear as her eyes fell to the card, not realizing he was standing right behind her. Forcing herself to move, her hand dropped to the bed, picking up the little pink note. Her name was scribbled on the side facing up and when she flipped it over, there were only three words jotted down, in a handwriting she could never erase from her mind; 

𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹 𝓎𝑜𝓊, 𝒶𝓃𝑔𝑒𝓁.

Dread ate at her insides as she stared at the card, feeling vomit in the back of her throat. The note fell from her hand, but before it could even land back on the bed, August stepped forward, reaching a hand up to brush the hair back off of her shoulders. His thumbs brushed over the thin straps of her bra. It didn’t surprise her that he had found her, but now that he had, she wished she had run just a little faster. 

“Do you know how badly I’ve missed you, angel?” August’s voice was smooth and honeyed, his breath tickling her neck as he pushed her bra straps down her shoulders. His touch was cold and almost desperate, as if he was fearful that she would disappear in the blink of an eye. And almost just as bad, she ripped herself out of his hands, backing away as she turned to look at him. It had been years, now, nearly three since she’d stared into those zaffre eyes, since she had been petrified by that dead, sobering glare. 

“I- you… c-can’t be here,” she stumbled over her words, the last bit of color leaving her face as she looked onto his face. 

“I can’t?” August answered her, his brow pulling down as he stalked towards her, his hands reaching up to his collar, loosening his tie. “Who's going to make me leave?” Sliding his tie from around his neck, August held it loosely in his right hand, a little sneer rising to his face. 

The air around them almost felt suffocating. Each one of his words came out in a soft, gentle breath, almost as if he was worried he’d scare her away like some stray animal. “I’ve thought about you every waking moment we’ve been apart,” August closed the distance between them, “thought about how it would feel to taste your lips again, run my fingers through your hair, be inside of you again,” the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end and her breath caught in the back of her throat. 

“No-” she whimpered, but it was too late. Before she had even realized it, August had wrapped his arms around her, tying her wrists together behind her back with his tie. And now it was too late to react, to struggle. He continued to back her up against the wall, caging her inside of his arms. “O-ow,” she choked, his weight pressing her flat against the wall, squishing her hands beneath them. 

August grinned, his hands running down her curves to the waistband of her jeans, where his fingers teased the button and her zipper. “Are you going to try and fight, baby girl? You know I love a good fight,” he purred. Pushing them down her hips, she couldn’t help the pleas that it evoked. His hand was forcing its way between her thighs, driving her legs apart. “Stop-” she choked out, the tips of his fingers pinching and pulling at the thin layer of lace that shielded her for the moment. 

It was hard to remember a time when she wanted August, yearned for his touch and would beg for it. That time had long since passed, back when everything was masked by smoke and mirrors. When she didn’t know the truth of who he was. 

“Your body doesn’t seem to agree with you.” It was true that her body was betraying her, warmth pooling in her gut and she had wet through her panties, excited and sticky for his touch. Animalistic and carnal noises broke in the back of his throat. She arched her back, but tried throwing her shoulders against him, squirming her legs. Any attempt to push him off of her, but he had her pinned firmly between his body and the wall, unmovable like a mountain. His fingers pushed her panties to the side, the sensation of his fingers exploring and dipping inside of her causing her breath to catch in the back of her throat. “Nice and tight, no one’s been in here since me, have they, darling?” 

Her face blushed red, burning hot from embarrassment as she looked up to meet his royal blue eyes. She’d never admit it to him, but since August, no other man had been able to please her in the way he could. Having him here now felt like some weird mash up of a blissful dream and a hellish nightmare. Her body was responding in ways she hated, her thighs were trembling and every new touch had a desperate moan dripping off of her tongue. 

Supple lips caressed over her shoulder, towards the crook of her neck, placing gentle, sweet kisses up her neck. “You thought that you could leave me, that you could get away from me,” the tone of his voice was now taking a dark shift, his tongue sharp enough to cut like a knife. The tender prodding he’d been doing between her legs finished, August forced two of his fingers into her cunt knuckle deep, eliciting a sharp painful gasp from her pouty lips. “You’ve always belonged to me, angel.” 

There wasn’t much fight in her, not for August. She’d always been so terrified of him, it had taken every ounce of courage she had to leave his apartment that night. Under the light from the hanging moon, she had left all of her things and just escaped. And now that his body was crushing down on her, forcing the air from her lungs, forbidding any sort of noise from now leaving her lips, he fucked her relentlessly with his fingers. August had every intention of taking back what was rightfully his, and tonight, he’d make sure to tie them together for the rest of their lives. 

Pulling his hand free from between her legs, he admired the glistening wetness that coated him. Just another thing that pushed him further into delusion, helping him to believe that she really did want this. Stepping away from her, the woman took in a deep breath, crying out in relief as air flooded her lungs. She collapsed to her knees and he just laughed, circling her like a predator hunting its prey. “Isn’t that a beautiful sight.” 

Stopping behind her, August grabbed her up by her arms, moving her to the edge of the bed where he slammed her chest down into the mattress. Her face was pressed down into the blankets, hot and sweltering already as she cried, begging for mercy though her voice was hidden and muffled. “Stop it, August! Stop, I don’t want this!” Kicking her legs and trying to squirm back up to her feet, August leaned forward and held her head down firmly into the sheets, stomping at her legs until her fighting stopped. 

If it hadn’t been obvious before, she knew now that she had no choice in the matter. She belonged to August, she always would. And he was here to take back what he owned. 

Flinching at the sound of his zipper, she gasped when he kicked her knees apart, positioning her just how he wanted. His hand moved up the curve of her ass, to her lower back where he pressed down sharply, forcing her to arch her back. On display for him now, August admired her sopping wet core, red and swollen, begging for attention that he was ready to give. Slapping and grabbing at her round ass, August probed another finger inside of her, a hot tingle running straight to the head of his cock. She was intensely tight around him, squeezing and hugging onto him in an effort to keep him inside. “You can’t keep lying, just admit it, you want me.” 

“No!” She refused to budge, clawing and grabbing fistfuls of blanket in her hands, keeping her eyes screwed shut tightly in an attempt to keep herself from crying. Continuously, she tried to close her thighs, hide herself from him but he would just force her open once more. August grabbed her hips tightly in his hands, his fingers pressing into her skin so firmly he was sure to leave bruises behind as he mounted her. Lining his cock up with her entrance, all he cared about was feeling her stretching around him, his own satisfaction.

The head of his cock teased and slid against her folds, “I’m going to fuck this pussy so hard you won’t even be able to think about running away from me again.” Sliding himself into her until his balls slapped against her cunt, August groaned, his eyes rolling back into his head. A frenzied cry tore through the room and she pressed her own face down deeper into the mattress, biting down on the blankets to keep herself quiet. She knew August enjoyed a loud show, enjoyed knowing just how much pain he was putting her through and she didn’t want to give him the pleasure. 

August didn’t care to wait for her to accommodate to his girth, instead, beginning to ram himself back and forth. Her walls stretched and molded around him, squeezing him tightly and coercing him to fuck even deeper. The fevered sounds of skin on skin slapping echoed through the room, her quiet whimpers of pain and ecstasy breaking through every now and then, but August didn’t halt. The bed underneath of her rocked and swayed, threatened to collapse with the force August was exerting into her.

He didn’t allow her to get used to his rhythm either, reaching forward, he let one hand free of her hip to wrap her dark hair around his fist, forcing her to arch up off of the mattress. No longer could she use the bed to quiet the sounds of her cries. August fucked her with a fiery passion, completely taking over her body as he held her flush to his chest. “Scream for me,” he moaned into her ear, sweat already perspiring across his face and shoulders. 

Slamming into her cervix, waves of ecstasy and pleasure seemed to be crashing around inside of her as his size demanded to be felt. Her brain felt foggy and dazed, unable to think rationally any longer as she panted and moaned, relaxing her back against his chest as he fucked into her. Her hands, still tied behind her back, tried grabbing at his shirt, twisting the material in her fingers as he broke out into raspy, hot grunts.

She was almost beginning to enjoy herself, getting over how she had wanted nothing to do with him, wanting nothing to do with this. She felt so full, molded around him, like he fit so perfectly inside. Had she missed him? His arm wrapped around her chest, his hand running up until her neck was held tightly in his grip. Closing off her airways, she gasped for breath, tears burning the corners of her eyes as she grinded her ass back on him, partially enjoying herself, partially wishing for it to come to an end, for him to just finish. 

“Fuck,” August groaned against her ear, his breath hot, yet still sending shivers down her spine. “You feel so good, missed you so much,” he pressed his lips to the back of her head as he continued to press himself harder into her. “Gonna make sure you can never leave me again,” he promised her, his strokes becoming slower but deeper. August was making sure to take his time, enjoying every single second of feeling her cunt squeezing him. 

With his hand still gripping her throat, she was unable to speak, her face turning a pale shade from the lack of air. All she could do was wheeze, her fingers scratching at the skin beneath his shirt. Every ridge and groove hugged August’s cock, his head kissing her cervix as he sheathed himself deep inside of her. She couldn’t ignore the sudden hot sensation washing over her as her cunt spasmed and gripped him tightly, feeling little explosions going off in her stomach as she came hard on his cock. 

That was all August had been waiting for. He released his hand from her throat, letting it fall back to her hips as he dug his nails into her, releasing his hot load deep inside against her womb. Still bucking his hips up into her, August rode out his climax alongside her. Deep, guttural moans almost completely hiding the sound of her crying as he filled her. Her knees began to violently shake, and her chest fell back against the mattress, heaving as she tried to catch her breath. Tears blurred her vision and smeared down her face as she felt August leave her, his hot semen dripping from her core. He moved back to his feet, his azure eyes trained still between her legs, watching as his essence trickled from her cunt like some sweet nectar. 

“You can never escape me now.” 

[shinjukuspiritcommittee]

Bullied

Into the Corner

~You couldn’t sleep. It was past midnight and you had finished your schoolwork but couldn’t get to sleep. Your encounter earlier shook you up a bit. Now while in App Battles you were credited at being one of the better users there are but without the App… you were a regular student. Regardless of how much value people would put on you, those who had no knowledge of the app made you the target of their ridicule. It was waning on your conscience you had a night terror that outside of the app you had nothing much like those bullies made you believe. You didn’t want to go to sleep tonight. It sucks…

~You caught yourself tearing up that you had to force yourself to push those thoughts aside. Maybe some air can help so you rushed out and sat just outside the dorms. It was a quiet night with the moon shining down giving the school a nice luminescence. A deep sigh of the brisk night air calmed your nerves a little but your mind would still wander to their taunts and threats.

With Shiro

~“This is unexpected.” Shiro said as he stepped outside to your side. You were surprised and asked what he was doing out here so late. “Funny, I could ask the same of you.” Your strategist replied. “It’s not like you to go for a walk this late in the evening. Normally because you can’t make a pass at anyone this late…” You laughed and asked him not to tease you so casually. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. But seeing you like this you looked as though you could use a good laugh and someone to talk to.” You did your best to try and say that nothing was wrong. You claim you just wanted some air.

~“Then why do you look so down on yourself?” Huh? “I saw you leave your room and you looked… lonely.” So he was watching you. “Not just then, but also… you’ve been acting weird the past few days. You’ve barely been paying attention during our meetings, you’ve been spending a lot of free time alone, and to top it off you’ve been avoiding us. Honestly, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about it ever since I noticed.” You remained silent, the words unable to surface. You asked Shiro if he could keep a secret since you didn’t want to lie and knew that even trying to would result in Shiro just calling you out. “Of course. You can trust me with anything.”

~… You had finished explaining what was on your mind to Shiro. Honestly you were ashamed of having these feelings since you know so many rely on you but it couldn’t be helped- “Don’t apologize.” Almost immediately Shiro pulled you into an embrace. Taken off guard you let out a gasp of confusion. You didn’t quite get why but it definitely felt nice to be held like this… “I know you can’t bear all of this alone. I didn’t think you would even try… but, I’m happy you confessed to me. Just please don’t ever think that you’re alone. I’ll always be here for you to lend an ear and help however I can. You can always depend on me.” You didn’t have any words for Shiro. Instead you could just feel the tears falling down your face as you finally hugged him back and whimpered into his blazer. You spent the rest of that evening with the company of Shiro as the two of you devised a plan to properly confront the bullies and have the situation dealt with.

With Kengo

~“There you are, Partner!” Kengo said as he approached you with a big grin on his face. “Haven’t been out on a night like this in a while, yeah?” You admitted that you have been slacking in the extensive training department, but quickly tried to use schoolwork as a lame excuse for your lack of motivation. “I wouldn’t worry too much about all that, the training is totally more important.” But what good is training if you’ll get stuck in detention when you need to be battling the most. “Ah-!” It seems you found the flaw with his method.

~“W-Well what about you!? What about tonight makes it so special to finally come out- uh I mean…!” So he noticed. “...course I noticed…” Kengo whispered. You fell silent due to your embarrassment for being called out like this. “First you stop going to the meet ups, then you stop staying out and training. And just recently you’ve been avoiding us during the day.” You described it as just complicated. “Well, what the hell’s got you so worked up!? Just tell us already!” Frustrated you snapped back that you couldn’t. “Why the hell not!?” Because it’s embarrassing! Kengo was shocked at your frustration and taken aback by your tears.

~You took a deep breath and explained to him what’s been on your mind lately. “Y-Y-Y…” Kengo seemed like he didn’t know what to say as he was too shocked. “YOU COMPLETE IDIOT!” He roughly grabbed you by the collar and you were hoisted up off your feet. You panicked at being carried so suddenly but when you see his face close up you can see he’s very poorly holding back tears. “You’re a complete dumbass. Why didn’t you just knock the daylight’s out of them? Why didn’t you do something!? Why…” Kengo’s tears finally began to fall. “Why didn’t you just tell us? I woulda clocked em out so hard…” You put your hands over Kengo’s and he managed to set you down. You continued to hold Kengo’s hands in yours. You apologized for being an unreliable partner and promised him you’d look to him more for help. But… maybe save the skull bashing for later.

With Ryota

~“Mmm…?” You let out a reply of surprise and asked why Ryota was up at such an hour. “I… heard someone leave their room and…” He seems to have woken up on accident since he still seemed quite groggy. You apologized and asked Ryota to go back to bed since it was pretty late. “But… what about you?” You told Ryota that you’d go to bed soon, but you needed some air. “Then… I need some air too.” He seemed to snap to attention and immediately jumped to your side. You didn’t mind but you were worried for him not getting enough rest. “It’ll be okay. I’ve got you with me, right?” Right…

~You felt a bit guilty being unable to speak to Ryota. The two of you spent some time in absolute silence that it started getting a little weird. Awkwardly you attempted to speak up, but when you did he attempted too as well. The two of you properly apologized and went back to being silent for another few seconds before you finally offered him to go first. “Uh, right…” Ryota gulped and looked straight at you. “Why… have you been avoiding us lately?” Huh? “You… don’t go to meetings anymore, in class you’re barely focused, and during lunch you go hide by yourself.” You tried to explain it wasn’t like that. “Then why? Even now you’re not even looking right at me!” Your friend asked desperately. Getting right to the heart of it…

~“Wha-!?” Ryota gasped as you explained what you’ve been subjected to the past few weeks. You honestly just didn’t want the others to worry about you. “Y-You…” He stammered out. “Why? Why couldn’t you just tell us?” Tears started welling in your eyes and his. “Why don’t you trust us? Why don’t you trust me?” He cried. You asked Ryota to not cry with tears falling on your face as well. You pulled Ryota in close and rubbed his back as the two of you cried. You apologized to Ryota and that you didn’t mean to hurt him. “I… I just want to help.” He replied. “But I can’t if you don’t tell me.” You and Ryota spent the rest of the night together talking and comforting one another.

With Toji

~“And where do you think you’re running off to?” Toji asked briskly as he approached you from the shadows. You let out a small gasp but immediately calmed down when he emerged from the shadows. You let him know he nearly scared you to death. “Don’t be ridiculous. You would have only fainted for just a moment.” He said quite sternly. “So, what are you planning on doing since it is past curfew after all?” You just said you needed some air since tonight seemed like a good night. “I see. In that case I’ll accompany you.” You asked him why. “Because it’s my duty to make sure you stay out of trouble. I can’t have you running off on your own and causing more trouble than necessary.” Regardless of your insistence that you weren’t going to cause mischief Toji still tagged along anyway.

~You and Toji didn’t say much to one another. It wasn’t that surprising to you since Toji wasn’t typically known for idle chatter, however he took notice of your behavior. “Is everything alright?” He asked bluntly. You said everything was all good and what would inspire such a question. “So that’s the way you want to handle it, then.” You and Toji resumed your shared silence. The night was definitely a good one to be out and despite his usual complaints Toji was good company on calm days like today. You were feeling a little guilty that your friend was spending all this time with you and you were being obstinate. So you apologized to him…

~and explained what’s been going on. Making sure to emphasize that you didn’t mean to isolate yourself from the others, but rather you didn’t want these issues to be a burden. “I thank you for the consideration but if I may…” Toji hesitated for a moment before gathering the courage he needed to say what he felt he needed to. “You’re acting like a brat. ‘Not wanting to be a burden’? Someone like you has no right saying that.” That caught you off guard. “You’re constantly butting into everyone else’s affairs but suddenly you can’t be bothered to speak up when your own feelings are on the line. Do you not see the hypocrisy in that?” Toji continued to give a rather emotionally driven lecture to you, leaving you feeling like an idiot and admittedly well on the verge of tears. When he realized that he may have gone too far with his words, Toji comforted you and remained by your side until you went back to your dorm for rest.

[n6or]

don’t leave me | raihan nsfw

Rating: Explicit 

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply 

Category: F/M 

Fandom: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions 

Relationships: Kibana | Raihan/ReaderDande 

Additional Tags: Self-Insert, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Drunk Sex

Words: 4456

READ HERE ON AO3!

It was a blur, really. A messy night of open-mouthed kisses and desperate touches between two hopeless singles. His mouth had found the soft skin of your neck, sucking, biting, bruising the beautiful canvas with his own work of art. Your back had arched up off his bed, thighs trembling as strong hands caressed your supple curves. Even drunk he had you wrapped around his finger, flushing furiously as his hot breath fanned against your ear. You knew it was a mistake—knew that it was just a drunken fling, but the way he held you, the way he whispered those sweet nothings as if it were only the two of you left in the world… it made your heart flutter.

And that’s why, when the first rays of light disrupted your sleep, you knew you had to leave. The light that filtered through the thin curtain made your head throb- made you want to groan and grumble in annoyance, but that would stir Raihan.

Raihan.

Ah.

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes and blinked.

Morning blurs were the worst...

From your right came a quiet grumble, the Dragon Tamer clearly disturbed by your efforts of reaching over to grab your glasses from the bedside table. You bit your lip once his very strong (and very naked) arm tightened around your waist.

The way the sun poured through from your left, highlighting his beautiful, brown complexion… It made your heart flutter. It reminded you of why you had to leave. And that’s why you did. With no note, no goodbye, and no apology, you left.

Raihan was your best friend--he had always been your best friend. Ever since you were children you had been inseparable; wherever one was, the other wouldn’t be too far. You both followed very strict rules. Very strict rules imposed by a certain dragon gym leader. You were best friends and that was it. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, of accidentally breaking your heart and having you leave him forever.

“I mean, it’s not like you even like me, so it’s not too much to ask, yeah?”

The way he smiled that day almost knocked the wind from your lungs. How could he be so dense? You weren’t sure if you wanted to yell or cry or both. So instead, you smiled and gave him a sharp nudge of the elbow to his ribcage.

“Of course I don’t like you, idiot.”

You rushed down the brick pathway of Hammerlocke, praying that you could just make it back home without too much disturbance. Thankfully, it seemed as if your author was kind and you returned home to have a brisk shower. You grimace at the constellation of reds and purple that litter your chest, neck, thighs, shit!

“Good job, Dragon tamer,” you growl before drying yourself off and changing into your uniform.

There’s a shaky sigh as you pull on your lab coat, noticing the way the red blemishes (along with the very prominent bite marks) are still visible above your collar. Tapping your foot repeatedly, you let out another heavy huff, removing your glasses for a moment.

“Stupid idiot,” you mumble again, voice quiet, shaky. You rub your temples, fingers trembling slightly. “You ruin everything. Every single damn time!” Whether your words were directed at Raihan or yourself, you don’t quite know… but the burn in your chest doesn’t ease up at all.

The memories of last night ache your head as you stroll into the research facility, scarf around your neck, eyes fixated on the floor as you make your way to your desk.

“Heya~ Well don’t you just look beautiful~” Sonia is laughing as she approaches your desk, twirling some of her ginger hair. “I didn’t think you’d really get that drunk! You almost outdrank me!”

You grimace at the thought, adjusting your glasses.

“Y-Yeah… It was pretty wild, I guess.”

“Hm… and you disappeared sometime after Raihan left, too!” Sonia is pouting and you can feel the anxiety swelling in the pit of your throat. “Did you both get home oka-”

“Delivery!”

Thanking the heavens above, you shout suddenly, “I’ll get it!” Before leaving your desk. You sign for the package and ignore the chuckling comments made about your scarf in the summer heat. You just smile and bid them a safe journey before closing the doors.

Staring down at the box in your hands, you worry your lower lip, teeth anxiously raking at the soft skin. You could avoid talking about it, but you couldn’t avoid the way you felt about it. Your stomach was shallow and your chest felt . . . weird. You couldn’t describe it. But knowing that the friendship between you and Raihan had been destroyed in one night… It felt like a cold cavity.

The scarf helped.

           It helped more than that delivery man knew.

It’s lunchtime when you first check your phone. You were anxious, terrified of seeing a message from Raihan, but there was nothing. You stared at the screen in disbelief for a few short moments.

“You expecting a call?” Sonia suddenly asks, leaning over your shoulder and peaking at your phone screen.

“S-Sonia!” You yelp, clutching your phone to your phone and looking up at the ginger.

“What? It was just a simple question, y’know~ if you need to go make a call to a certain someone I totally get it!” She fixes your scarf with a small smile before offering a rather sympathetic smile. “But I hope you’re okay… You seem really…” She trails off and drags a chair over to sit beside you, sighing. “You seem out of it. Like, normally I wouldn’t press this kind of thing, because I know it makes you nervous, but it’s affecting your work and…”

“I’m fine.” You manage out, interrupting her second trailing sentence. She searches your eyes, a gentle hand now resting on your knee. Then she nods.

“Alrighty then!” Sonia gives you a firm rub to the shoulder before leaving some documents.

When she leaves, you sigh, leaning back into your chair. There’s a faint wince from the dull ache in your hips, head hanging over the back of the chair.

This was going to suck.

                       Bad.

The day is long and drawn out and by the end of it you’re certain you’re going to pass out. You can’t quite pinpoint when you actually fell asleep last night, but it must’ve been late considering the daze that seems to be clouding your head. Reaching for a Poke-ball from your bag, you falter for a moment. You notice one rotom phone in amongst your keys, but then you find a second… and it’s Raihan’s.

“C’mon!” Raihan laughs into your ear. Your cheeks are burning by this stage. Hell, with the way his hands hold your hips and his lips caress the shell of your ear, you’re certain that the heat you’re exuding could cook any curry. “Let’s dance, babe! It’s one night~ C’mon! Put my phone in your bag and let’s dance~”

The memory hits you like a truck -- so hard that you’ve had to crouch. A poke ball rolls out of your opened bag and out pops a familiar little Leafeon. She hums softly, curiously, waddling over to nuzzle against your thigh.

“Lea? Leafeon?” She purrs, her two little paws resting on your knee as she leans up and nudges her nose against the backs of your hands. Your fingers part and you meet her caramel eyes, earning and excited squeak from the eeveelution. She presses her nose to your cheek, and you sigh shakily.

You have to pull it together.

And that’s exactly why you did the only thing that you knew you could do in this situation; you called Leon.

“Heya! How’s it going, mate?” Leon’s voice is somewhat strained as he speaks, words hurried.

“Uh, hey Lee. I wanted to--” You can hear muffled voices in the background as you talk. You frown. “Ask you a favour… Could I drop something off to you?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah! Sure mate, sure! Uh--Hop, just--Sorry, Y/N, I’ve got a situation here, haha.”

“Oh… I could call back if you…”

“No! Wait, Y/N, wait!” It’s Raihan’s voice. You blink, swallowing thickly.

“I-I have to go. Can you tell Raihan that Sonia will have his phone? Thanks.”

You hang up.

Leafeon purrs sadly, her head pressing to the shaking of your palm. She licks it gently before nudging at your leg.

You had to take the phone to Sonia.

All you wanted to do was disappear.

And that’s what you did.

Without explanation, you shoved Raihan’s phone into Sonia’s hands and took off to the Wild Area.

“You’ll--You’ll regret this,” you whisper, breathless. “Raihan.. Ha…”

“I could never regret making love to you,” he countered quietly, larger hands holding your thighs, your legs over his shoulders as he kissed up to your throbbing warmth. “Never, Y/N.”

His mouth is hot against you, tongue lapping up the sopping wetness of your nether regions. The way he curls his tongue inside of you would have, on normal circumstances, remindws you that this isn’t his first rodeo, and, on normal circumstances, that would have you refusing any sort of affection let alone sex… but with the aid of a little alcohol, you didn’t care. You wanted to hold Raihan, to let him touch you, to use you, to love you… even if it was only for one night.

You wanted to love him, even if it was a drunken mistake on his behalf.

Pushing back the vines of your secret little area, you sigh shakily. Along the way you had released Bewear from her friend ball; she had let you rest on her back, taking you back to the little place most of your Pokemon knew you loved. You give her a warm squeeze before dropping back down to your feet.

It’s a clearing decorated with beautiful wild flowers, shrubs, lit by nothing by the moon and the little lights that litter the night sky. Your hands are shaky as you pitch your tent, Beware and Leafeon both try their best to help you, sensing that something is off. Once the tent is done, you smile your thanks, give them one final embrace, and return the pair back to their respective Poke-balls. You tuck both away into your satchel and sigh. Tonight, you decide to go to bed without dinner, and without checking your phone. And instead, you grab your dragon jacket -- the one matching to Raihan’s -- and curl into it.

You don’t recall how long the cries racked your body for, but somewhere along the way your silent sobs ceased, and exhaustion won.

You were gone for almost a week. On the first absence from work Sonia had called you, on the third day with no word it was Leon who called you, and on the seventh day…

Well, when you woke up, it wasn’t morning, nor were you alone. Considering your world was blurred from the lack of glasses, all you could see was the outline of a giant, black shadow moving outside your tent. Your eyes widened when you heard the twig snap. Battling was not your speciality. You see, you never wanted to be champion, that was always Raihan’s dream. You were happy to live a contented life amongst your Pokémon and work for Sonia as her assistant until Hop was old enough to train…

So, to put it simply, you were completely

and utterly

fucked

right now--

especially if that thing intended on fighting you.

You reach for your glasses first, grabbing your ladle second. Like hell you’d put your Pokémon in danger. You’re shaking profusely as you quietly raise to your feet, eyes burning, stinging, wet. As you approach the entrance of your tent, you hear a hushed profanity leave the beast outside. You pause instantly, brows knitting together.

“Fuckin’ sticks,” comes the growl.

That’s when you launch yourself out of the tent, aiming high with your ladle and throwing it at the offender.

“O-Oi! Y/N, Y/N! It’s me! It’s--” Raihan’s standing there, hands raised defensively, eyes flicking between you and the murder weapon. He blinks incredulously. “Is that-- …Is that a ladle?”

“Yes it’s a ladle. Mind your business. More importantly, why are you here at goodness knows what time, you moron?! You’re--that’s so inconsiderate of you! I seriously thought I was going to die, you stupid, big, dragon, moro--” Your words are cut off when two strong arms envelope you into the tightest, warmest hug you have ever received.

“I know.. I know. I’m sorry, Y/N.”

Your arms lay limp by your sides, eyes staring up at the full moon. Ah. It’s beginning to blur for you now.

“Stop it,” you whisper, voice feeble. “I don’t want this. I don’t want you doing this…”

“I have to apologise, Y/N.”

He clutches you tighter, his face buried in the warmth of your hair.

“No you don’t. If you apologise, then you will end up apologising for what happened--for being drunk. You’ll say it was a mistake and you never wan--”

Again, your words are cut off, but this time it’s by a warm pair of lips occupying your own. Your eyes are wide, tears glistening in the light of the moon.

Your hands come to his chest and you push him back.

“S-Stop that,” You wipe your mouth on the back of your hands, looking away. “Go away, Raihan. You’re-- You’re making things worse.”

Raihan grabs your wrists so gently… they’re almost completely different to the ones you felt the other night.

“Do you really want me to go away, Y/N…?” His voice is quieter than usual -- all his usual confidence seemingly extinguished. You feel the way his lips press tenderly against each of your fingers. It makes thinking hard.

“You’re…” By now you’re looking down, embarrassed, flustered… “You’re the one who made the rules… It was never me. I never wanted them but you’re too stupid to realise that I’ve been-” You cut yourself off from pouring out anymore unnecessary information. Your eyes are wet again. Snatching your hands away from the dragon gym leader, you turn your back to him and move away. “This is your fault and here I am, trying to fix your mess again…” You rub at the back of your neck, sighing shakily. You take your glasses off and rub at your eyes profusely, angrily, shoulders trembling.

“Y/N…” Raihan’s voice is so small as he moves to stand behind you. “It was shit what I did-”

“It was.”

“And I’m shit-”

“You are.” You sniff and there’s silence.

“But please don’t send me away, Y/N. I know I made those stupid rules. I was scared. I know that sounds stupid, but we were so young, and I was already so into you…” You can feel his fingertips gingerly reaching to touch you but pulling back just before he can complete the contact. “That night wasn’t a mistake at all. You’re not a mistake, Y/N. I’m pissed off that I took advantage of you while you were drunk… While we were both drunk… and for that—man… you’ll never get how sorry I am.” The crack in his voice makes you flinch.

Hesitantly, your fingers meet, yours curling around his, faces still downcast. You hear the breath of relief, followed by the forehead dropping onto your shoulder. His free arm wraps slowly, cautiously, around your waist, drawing you back into him. His face is wet in the crook of your neck and you have to bite your lip to stop yourself from crying again.

Instead, you turn around in his arms and bury yourself into his chest, his arms caging you between them and the warmth of his body. Your hands move up the outlines of his tensing shoulder muscles, fingers curling into the back of his shirt.

“I thought the promises would stop me losing you,” he murmured. “But instead they just fucked things up even more, huh?” His hand goes to the back of your hair, fingers entangling in the back of your feathery strands of hair.

The embrace you share under the moon lasts forever. Your body slots perfectly against Raihan’s larger frame. You feel so exhausted, yet so content, so secure, you never knew this state was possible.

“Y/N,” Raihan whispers quietly, fingers threading through your hair. You look up and his hands move to cradle your flushed cheeks, thumbs smoothing over the dampened, burning skin. His eyes search yours, his brows knitted, silently asking and searching for your answer.

When your lashes flutter shut and you tilt your head up, he leans down slowly, taking his time to press your lips together; to relish in suppleness, in the way they fit together perfectly, his slightly thicker than yours, but as gentle as ever. The kiss is slow and patient, easing your anxious heart and near on leaving you breathless. You were never good at the whole kissing thing, never knowing where to put your hands, when to breathe—do you breathe while kissing?

Embarrassed, you pull away, turning your face in an attempt of hiding the way the moon highlights your burning cheeks.

“What’s wrong? Did I go too fast?” You shake your head, leaning into his palm.

“I… don’t know how to do that kinda stuff, y’know? The other night… You and I, well…”

Raihan’s expression was unreadable for a moment before he slowly took your hand in his, staring down into your eyes.

“I can teach you if you want,” he whispers softly, squeezing your hand. “I know I don’t deserve it… but I don’t want to be just the best friend, Y/N. If you don’t want me, I’ll respect that, and I’ll walk away right now… but if you’ll have me then I guess I’m asking…”

“S-Stop being so… Sh-Sheesh… You’re so not that cocky little brat of a gym leader I know…” You peek up at him over your glasses and offer a sheepish grin. His eyes blink wide, almost like an excited puppy, and he tackles you into a bone-crushing hug.

You’re about to protest when suddenly his lips are on yours, and just like the other night, you’re melting into the warmth of the Dragon Tamer. Skilled hands find your hips and slowly guide you back into the tent. There’s a small ting, a low groan, and a muffled laugh when you step into the shelter. Raihan breaks the kiss to rub his injured head, laughing along with you.

Taking your hands, Raihan leads you back to the cot, slowly reclining you back onto the softer surface. He hovers above you, leaning on his arm, one knee between your thigh whilst the other rests against you. He searches your eyes for any sign of hesitation or reluctance but finds none. It’s then that he leans down and recaptures your lips once more, observing the way your eyes flutter shut and your cheeks instantly warm. With his right hand, he caresses your thigh, squeezing it, and earning a quiet gasp from you.

Raihan takes the opportunity to slowly lick into your mouth, his tongue sliding over and around yours, eliciting wet, obscene noises that make your face burn even hotter. He figures you must be nervous with the way you cling to him, your arms laced around his shoulders tightly, lips shyly parted. Though it’s when he sucks on your tongue that you find yourself whining.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers against your swelling lips. When your eyes open, you noticed how his are glazed over with a look you’ve never seen before – his eyes half lidded and seemingly…lustful. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/N. Can I take photos? Just for us, y’know?”

“H-Haa?! But--? It—Dammit, Raihan. If those photos leak—if even one soul sees—I will end yo—”

You’re cut off with another cheeky kiss, the younger boy laughing into your mouth. He pulls back and smiles at you once more before setting up his Rotom.

“Like hell I’d let anybody else see you like this, babe,” The Rotom flies into the air as Raihan shoots you an almost animalistic smirk. “You’re mine now, Princess. And only I’m gonna be usin’ those photos.”

Raihan finds himself kissing up your bare thighs after having slowly dragged your underwear off and away, desperate to have his head between your thighs again. You gasp when you feel his two fingers pry your lips apart, his tongue taking its time to roll over and around your clit. Your back arches up off the bed at the contact, thighs trembling either side of his head. Your hands scramble to find his hair, breath quickening as his tongue flicks and his lips suck at the sensitive bundle of nerves.

“Ra—Rai.. Shit—Ha, Raihan..” His name seems to be the only thing (other than profanities) that you seem to know. You buck your hips desperately into the other’s mouth, tugging on his hair and earning another low groan from the man.

“Now, now,” he mumbles against your heat, looking up at you from between your thighs. His gaze is lazy, seductive. He’s smirking at you, tongue slowly sliding along your clit, barely touching the wetness. “Be a good girl.” He instructs firmly, pushing your hips down.

You writhe beneath his strong hold as his mouth continues to abuse your sensitive regions, completely unrelenting in the way he sucks at your clit, teeth occasionally nibbling at the bud.  It’s then that you feel a familiar pressure building within your abdomen, curling like a coil that’s about to snap at any given moment. You try to warn Raihan, you do. You tug at his hair, choking out incoherent sobs of his name, trying to pull him off… but of course Raihan doesn’t give in. In fact, he pries his forefinger between your sodden, velvety walls and presses upwards, stroking along the upper roof of your sex.

That’s the final straw. It’s all too much to think about: his tongue, his teeth, his finger—

Before too long you’re coming with a loud cry, back arching up off the bed as he continues to thrust his finger inside of you, tongue mercilessly lapping at your throbbing clit. Your body convulses and shakes atop the cot, fingers tugging harshly at Raihan’s now matted black hair. You continue to cry his name as he licks you out, even replacing his finger with his tongue, groaning as he licks you clean.

You feebly push at his head, whimpering and twitching in the afterglow of your orgasm.

“Too… Too much—sensitive… No more, Rai.” He looks up at you from between your thighs, expression rather adorable. You pant through a smile, allowing a small laugh to pass. “How can you look so cute after doing something so lewd…?”

“Lewd? I don’t think making love is lewd!” He inches up your body, kissing over old marks that barely present themselves. “I’d do anything you asked me, babe.” You smile as he kisses you once again, but soon frown.

“But you haven’t…”

“It’s okay. I’m not really prepared, anyway. I don’t have any condoms.”

You nod slowly. You trace your fingers over his naked chest before looking back up to meet the gaze of the Dragon Tamer.

“Can I touch you?”

He blinks a few moments, seeming as If he has short circuited, but quickly nods. “Y-Yeah, yeah. Babe, that would be—shit, that’d be really good… D’you want me to show you?” At your nod, he takes your hand. “Do you have any oil around here? It’ll make it easier.”

You ponder over the question for a moment before reaching over into your bag and fishing out a small container of rose oil.

“Alright, sick. I’m gonna pour some in your hand, yeah? It’ll make it easier for you.” You nod, watching as he pours said oil into the palm of your hand. He observes your expression as he slowly shimmies himself out of his boxer shorts, snickering when your eyes widen. He kisses your forehead for a few lingering moments before taking your hand in his and guiding your hand to the base of his thick shaft. Raihan’s thick lashes fall shut once your soft hand touches his proud cock. He can’t stop the involuntary twitch of his hips.

You blink in disbelief, watching the way his face contorts as your hands slowly move along his pulsating cock. It’s quite hot, you note—the temperature of his… it makes you blush. Seeing him so pliant under your touch like this… it gives you a surge of courage – of boldness. You lean up and press soft kisses to the younger’s neck, following the twisting motion of his hand.

“Shit, Y/N,” he breathes, shakily. He thrusts into your hand when you near his tip. You notice the faint tremble of his hips. Your hand hesitantly moves to the other’s tip, squeezing the sensitive head, experimentally touching him. “F-Fucking—shit, Y/N. Keep that up and I’ll cum, babe.”

That’s the plan, dummy.

You snicker to yourself as his hand guides you up and down the entirety of his cock, twisting and squeezing in different positions, each stroke edging Raihan closer and closer to the edge.

“Y/N—Don’t stop. Fuck, please. ‘M gonna cum, baby. Fuck—just like that—” Raihan becomes increasingly vocal as your thumb swirls across the leaking slit of his dick, your free hand pumping the lubricated shaft of the other. “Y/N, fuck—coming!”

And with that final shout, creamy cum coils from the violently red slit of Raihan’s cock. He grits his teeth, body stiffening for a brief moment before he fucks your hand, head falling back as he rides the euphoria.

“You look cute like this,” Comes your sudden murmur, watching his hips buck into your hand before he slowly guides your hand to his own. He laces your fingers and smiles tiredly.

“You think?” he whispers, leaning down to nudge his nose against your temple. “Guess we’ll have to do it more often so you can see that cute expression of mine, huh~?”

Your face flushes ten times over at the comment, curling into his chest and hiding away (despite the uncomfortable stickiness now between you both). He chuckles loudly at your reaction, fingers tracing along your back as he kisses your head.

“So… this means we’re a couple now, yeah?” he asks after a few moments of silence. You’re slow in answering, but when you do, you look with a tired grin and nod. “Good. Because now I’m definitely never letting you go, babe.”

[silverwhiteraven]

Borne of the Stars - Chapter 12 - An MLB Kryptonian AU

Tag List:  @eve-valution @weird-pale-blonde-person @kris-pines04 @soulmate-game @abrx2002 @amayakans @vixen-uchiha @heldtogetherbysafetypins @raisuke06 @dorkus-minimus @mopester-is-here @moonlightstar64 @annabellabrookes @toodaloo-kangaroo @the-navistar-carol @elspethshadow @chocolatecatstheron​ @ivymala07 @maribat-is-lifeblood​

[ Summary: Author celebrates her Birthday by posting a chapter before the day is up. Kara meets her Kwami and circumvents her grounding. ]

[ Posted on Ao3 ] [ Chapter 1 ] [ Chapter 11 ] [ Chapter 13 ]

Kara was shocked, sure, but not taken completely by surprise. She spent enough time around Zee Zatara, Zatanna, to know what something being magically conjured into existence looks like. That didn’t stop her from taking a step back though; she knew she wasn't invulnerable to magic, and not knowing what was appearing called for a level of caution.

Her eyes went wide and the hand that had tightened into an instinctive fist went slack as the light faded and the form finished taking shape in the open air. The other hand around the open box tightened as she stared at the creature, grounding and preventing her next instinctual reaction at the sight: a soft squeal of aww.

She clamped her jaw shut tight to further prevent the sound as the little purple-tinged black feline opened apple green eyes and a fanged cheshire grin spreading and opening to form words.

“Well well well, what do we have here? Sure, I expected someone different than usual, but this takes the fondue!” He exclaimed then circled Kara, and she kept still as her eyes followed the floating creatures movements. 

“What the-!” She couldn't help gasping after he disappeared behind her in another of his circles and felt the faintest of feelings in her chest for only a moment, like a string being pulled through from the back to the front, before he emerged in front of her. Out of the spot she had apparently felt him going through her. “Not cool! Don’t do that!” 

“Fine, fine,” he shrugged nonchalantly, “but now I know all I need to. This is going to be fun,” and the grin returned, almost feral now alongside the previous mischievousness.

Kara glared in suspicion at the little creature, finally setting aside her inner feeling of ‘aww, so cute’ to focus on the problem at hand. In hand? She lifted the box back up and looked at the black ring inside, then back to the magical feline. “What do you mean, fun? What do you know?” 

The creature chuckled, “You aren't human; you may look like it on the outside, but the inside tells a different story.”

She shuddered at realizing what he had been doing when going through her chest cavity. “Ew, yuck, gross, no, do not go checking things like that- Wait- So you know? You can tell?”

“Obviously,” he drawled before looking away without explaining and started to zip around the semi-messy room like a hyper and curious cat. “Kid, you don’t happen to have any cheese, do you? Just a bite is fine; I hate to say it, but as much as I’d love to sit down and eat a whole wheel, I actually seem to be looking forward to transforming for once. Seeing what you can do with my help should be interesting!”

“And what exactly can you do, uh-?” Her skepticism fell flat when she realized she didn't know his name. She followed after the tiny creature as it left the bedroom and watched him sniff out the mini-fridge set up next to the television of the suite’s living room. He popped the door open with a cry of victory and dove in, coming back out with her string cheese and taking a bite out of it.

“Call me Plagg, Kwami of Destruction, source of power for the Black Cat Miraculous you’re holding.” He seemed to raise an eyebrow at Kara as she looked down at the ring in the box, brushing a finger over the apple green paw print on the center. “Well? Put it on already!”

She hesitantly took the ring from the box, tossing the empty container to the side. Another glance at the waiting Kwami and she slid it on. Her eyes went wide as the ring turned a weathered gold, the shape turning to that of a signet ring. The shape of the seal was close to that of the one her and her cousin both wore as heroes: the Crest for the House of El. It was still different, though: not the usual stylized S, but rather, now the two ends of the S were reconnected into the original sideways infinity symbol. The S itself was still the prominent, though. 

Kara looks back at Plagg and the smug look he wore. “Neat, huh?”

“Yeah…” She hesitates before continuing to ask her new question. “What, exactly, is a Kwami?”

“Oh you know, just like any old gods, deities, incarnations and embodiments; whatever you want to compare us to. Basically forces of nature, concepts, and magic that, when tired to Miraculous, can have our powers channeled through other beings to do good. Well, good is supposed to be what we’re used for,” he adds with a glare out the window to the glowing streets.

“And that?” she wonders, noticing his stare.

“Yep, caused by the powers of one. You and the Ladybug Wielder are being called in to help recover one that's been used for evil. The Miraculous and the Kwami with it basically sent out a distress call when they were commanded to go against what we’re meant for.” 

Plagg looked sad as he said it, and Kara couldn't help but reach out in sympathy and give him a gentle pat on the head between the ears. It shook him out of it and he focused back on her. 

“Say ‘Plagg, Transform Me’ to pull me into the ring and suit up. The faster we get this over with, the sooner I can find myself a better cheese selection!”

“Wait, you said Ladybug Wielder, I get a partner?” She wasn't confused by it, having partners was normal for her, but the superhero in her wanted to make sure she didn't make a big mistake in misidentifying an ally.

“Yeah,” the Kwami confirmed, “the Creation to my Destruction, the symbol of Good Luck to my symbol of Bad Luck. The Ladybug to your Black Cat is out there and you two should be meeting each other soon, preferably before anything else so you can start working together.”

“How will I know who they are? Will they be easy to spot?”

Plagg cackled like a friend had just whispered an inside joke into his ear. “Oh yeah, very spottable.”

She raised a skeptical brow before shrugging it off. Instead of dwelling, she grinned and looked back out towards the chaos outside. Feeling ready, she called as instructed, “Plagg, Transform Me!”

The black, green, and white magic washed over her effortlessly, and just like other times friendly magic had been used on her, she felt almost nothing at all except the new weight of her costume settling itself. She did note her center of gravity had shifted, and wondered about the physical changes she may have gotten as well. One presented itself as she glanced through the doors to her bedroom, at her reflection in the full length mirror, and instead of a pleased and satisfied hum, there was a purr in its place.

Her new outfit really was satisfying to her tastes. It had an overall military uniform look to it with a formal flare. The top was mainly black and asymmetrical, a line of silver buttons going down one side, the collar straight with a line of green all around the edges. The sleeves ended in long, folded back cuffs at the wrists, also adorned with green trim and silver clasps. Clawed black gloves covered her hands, another tripping of green wrapping around her wrists. The black pants were complying to the formal look, complete with neat creases down the centers, but still had functionality with cargo-style pockets on the thighs. The shoes were heavy black combat boots, laced with overlapping green and silver ties. A sash wrapped around her waist, looking black but shimmered green underneath; one end fell loose behind her, swaying like a tail of its own accord; a silver baton stuck out where it was all tied together. The mask over her eyes, comfortable despite not being used to one, matched the tail in color: black with an underlying green sheen, except for the solid black that fell from her eyes like the tear marks of a cheetah. The feline ears atop her head, nestled into a new side swept undercut style, were solid black but for the green edging. The acidic green slit eyes were unsettling at first glance, but they pupils went wide and outright dorky as she looked herself over.

Her favorite part, however, had to be the cape. It was a one shoulder cape, draped over one arm in neat folds, the opposite side longer than the other as it fell behind her. The exposed shoulder had part of the cape attached to it, held by a black clasp with a silver crescent, but revealed a triple layer of silver shoulder plating. The opposite shoulder with the cape draped over it had a larger silver clasp holding it in place, but it was more like an emblem with its large black crescent moon encasing a green paw print. A few green straps held the shoulder pieces in place, from across her shoulders and down and around her torso.

“I’ll need a new name with the new look,” she muses. Her thoughts run quickly over far too many cliche names and ones already taken, before settling on one.

“Oncilla.”

She turns away from the mirror and laughs to herself, “I have never been this happy to get around a grounding so easily,” before going straight to the balcony doors, throwing them open, and launching herself into the open air with a whooping holler, more than happy to be back in the game.

[sergeant-donny-donowitz]

The Best Revenge (1/2) (DonnyxFem!Reader)

Requested  by @sodapop182​

@owba-chan @war-obsessed @inglourious-imagines

Let me know if you wanna be tagged in these! :)

It was early 1944...

The basterds' most recent mission led them to Switzerland, escorting one of the OSS' most important agents, along with top secret documents...

It took about two weeks to get from the middle of nowhere in  Nazi-Occupied France, to the middle of nowhere in neutral Switzerland.

They left the agent in the assigned point, and marched back the way they came immediately.

The sun had just set, the winter air was fierce. The snow was covering the ground. Hirschberg muttered through gritted, chattering teeth, "This fucking blows..."

Hugo grunted in agreement.

That was the most they'd heard from him from the point they stepped foot in Switzerland.

Smitty's teeth were chattering so loudly, Omar joked that they could hear him over the goddamn alps...

Aldo sighed. He knew his soldiers were tired, cold, hungry, and needed a break, and a drink or two.

His eyes fell on a tavern.

Warm, soft, inviting orange light flooded through the windows and slated over the white snow piling over the street. Pots with small flowers were hanging over the window sills, snow flakes still draped over them.

And music.

Swing... Something the boys hadn't heard in so damn long...

Aldo's hands were at his hips, he smirked as he looked at the tavern. "Welll...waddya boys say to a night off?"

Smitty raised an eyebrow, "I thought our night off was when we got back h-"

Donny pushed him, "Shut the fuck up, Smitty!"

Aldo smiled, "Come on, boys. Let's see what em' Swiss  got."

The boys piled into the tavern, immediately greeted by warmth, hearing chattering, and expecting the music to be coming from a record...

They found a live band.

Omar and Smitty, having grown up in New York felt so at home hearing it...

They all looked at each other, smiling as if they'd just gotten away with murder. They ordered their drinks and piled into booths.

It wasn't long before the music started dying down. Hirschberg frowned, cupped his hands over his mouth, and yelled "Boooooo"

Wicki had to pull his hands away and rolled his eyes, "The swiss are neutral, don't start a fucking war in their bar!"

Hugo nodded, "He's right."

Everyone turned to him with wide yes, "What???"

Hugo misunderstood, believing they just hadn't heard him, not that they were shocked to actually hear him say something after almost two weeks. He held up his beer stein and remarked, "It's nice here..."

Before the basterds could express any amusement or shock at Hugo's sociability, the music started to die down, and the band leader took the microphone.

He started speaking in German, which made some of the boys tense up a little. Aldo sighed as he leaned back in the booth, sniffing some of his tobacco, "Relax, boys. This is Switzerland."

They all eased up again, laughed over their drinks, and tried to piece together what the man was saying.

According to the little that Wicki listened to, "He said somethin' about the tavern's jewel?"

Omar narrowed his eyes, "You sure you got that right?"

Donny laughed, "Maybe by jewels he means the tavern's got whores or-"

The rest of the tavern, mostly locals and regulars broke out into applause. The lights dimmed, and the band started back up. People silently teared up over the song...

They heard a soft, silvery voice, almost like the disembodied spirit of a muse, singing just for them...

Her words were in French, but they were understood.

She, like everyone else in the world at war, was living day by day...

One song led to another, and all the time, the boys like everyone else, listened over their glasses and their jokes.

But Aldo kept looking at you...

You looked so damn familiar.

So goddamn familiar, he couldn't stop thinking about it.

He was stunned when he figured out where he saw you before... It was too good to be true, he thought.

Donny looked at you, then back at Aldo. "Old man's gonna have to try harder than that..."

Donny chuckled a little to himself, then he made eye contact with you. His heart skipped a beat as you began to sing another song. One he'd heard a few times before he was deployed. "You had plenty money in 1922. You let other women make a fool of you. Why don't you do right, like some other men do..."

He was so drawn to you, your eyes, the way you moved your hair, he forgot all about the other basterds, his drink, and the fact that Aldo was staring at you too...

Hirschberg  was the one that pointed out, "She don't have any accent...Is it weird that she doesn't got a fucken accent?"

Omar rolled his eyes, "Will you shut up and listen?"

Aldo nodded, still looking at  you, but acknowledging Hirschberg...

Something wasn't right...

The next, and final song threw most of the tavern over the moon...

"When the lights go on again all over the world. And the boys are home again, all over the world. And rain or snow is all that may fall from the skies above, a kiss won't mean goodbye, but hello to love..."

That was it.

Aldo knew it had to be you...

At the end of that song, you thanked the crowd, the lights came back on, and you went to the counter for a drink.

Aldo looked back at the basterds, "Stay here."

The basterds started making jokes immediately, and somehow that burned Donny on the inside as he glared through a side eye.

Aldo knew you. He knew exactly who you were. Back in 1943, when he was just getting the team together, he had to look through masses of files to find the right basterds for the job.

Your file had been in one of the stacks.

For lack of better words, it was “fucking impressive.”

That was saying a lot, if it came from Aldo Raine.

He's already set aside a few files that he was sure on: Sergeant Donny Donowitz, Private Smithson Utivich, and Private Gerold Hirschberg.

He had already set your file with theirs. He didn't even finish flipping through it. He'd seen enough. He needed you on his team. At that point in the war, your body count was higher than Donny, Smitty, and Hirschberg's combined. Besides your impressive kill streak, you had stolen enemy tanks and planes. You had an eye for spies. And you yourself were useful for spying, knowing a few extra languages did come in handy.

You were exactly what he needed... Only a basterd would steal a goddamn tank behind enemy lines straight out of boot camp.

Aldo had just set your file on the desk with the other three, when his general happened to walk in. He took the files in his hands, smiling in approval, until he saw yours. "Oh...this...this must have slipped in by mistake, son."

"Sir?"

The general had sighed, "Poor kid's MIA. Has been for a month or two, now. She was last seen running into a firefight. Every one of the boys on our side that was there didn't come back. Every one of them was accounted for and idetntified except for her.  It's most likely that she is a POW... Must've accidentally slippef this file in, sorry son."

Aldo flipped to the last page of your file, and saw a picture of you, and a paper with information about your home, your family, emergency contacts, the works.

It was stamped "MIA."

But there you were... nearly a year later. Not missing, and not in action. In a ruby red dress, fishnet stockings, and black gloves, sitting at a counter, drinking scotch.

He sat by you, ordered a drink, and remarked, "Didn't think Yankee tunes got so popular out here." He took a sip of his drink, and said, "You know, for bein' Swiss, your English is pretty good.... Perfect, I'd say."

You muttered a quick, "Thank you."

Trouble was the last thing you wanted...that's why you were in Switzerland.

Aldo lowered his voice, and leaned onto the counter on his forearm,  "You were a goddamn legend, Y/n. Why'd you desert?"

And apparently, trouble was what you got. You took a sip, and thought, "This might as well happen..."

You stayed stoic. "I didn't desert." The truth was, it grated you to say it. You had been in denial all that time, never wanting to think about the day it would inevitably come back and haunt you.

"Really? Last I heard you were MIA, most likely a goddamn POW....Looks like you went AWOL,  instead kid. What'd you do, take a tank for  a goddamn joy ride for a year? Cause we call that deserting"

You kept a distant demeanor, "You don't know what you're talking about."

He sighed, "I know you're scared, kid. Don't doubt that something happened out there."

You looked up at him for the first time, instantly recognizing him from nothing other than stories: Aldo the Apache.

He knew war as much as you did.

But...that didn't matter much to you. Or at least, you acted like it didn't. "What's it to you?" You looked him square in the eyes."

"I'm a soldier, y/n. I'd say I'm a reasonable man. I know I wanna go home some day, see my old man and my sisters again. I know everyone wants to get home some day. You got a family, don't you, kid? Don'tcha got your ma and pop waiting for you? Brothers and sisters? Or do you want them to keep thinking you're dead?"

You didn't respond.

"You know, if you go back to the ol' U.S of A like this," He gestured to you and  your outfit, "You're still a goddamn deserter. You can get the death penatly."

You nodded and muttered, "So I'm staying here."

Even you resented yourself for that. And you had for quite some time.

"I know there's more to it...there's gotta be." He saw a scar, just between your collar bone and throat. Whether it was from a bullet or a blade, he couldn't tell,  but he knew it was from the war. "I know you don't want this. But I don't wanna be up in the Smoky Mountains five, ten years from now, open up the paper an' see you done got sat in the electric chair. Ya understand, kid?"

You knew this day would come. You couldn't run forever. You weren't exactly a deserter, but you knew he was right. Even if you'd tried to deny it yourself, you really wanted to go home some day. Dishonor and trial by desertion was no way to die.

Not after everything you'd seen and done...

Aldo ordered some Irish whiskey...closest thing he'd had to burning Tennessee bourbon in years.

Aldo looked at you, genuinely taking pity on what a legend had become: a forgotten ruin. He looked back at his basterds. He started out with eight men in his command, ended up with nine...and then lost three. Simon Sakowitz, Michael Zimmerman, and Andy Kagan.

He needed more basterds, and you needed a way out. "So how bout I cut you a deal, kid?"

You didn't look at him, but he noticed you raised your eyebrow.

A tell that maybe you were interested in what he had to say after all. Maybe being a lost cause was a facade, an attempt at salvation from fear.

"You join my team, we don't tell nobody we found you here. We tell the brass we broke you outta POW camp. None of em boys needa know what'chu been doin' since October 1942-"

He noticed you flinch when you even mentioned that time...

He knew for certain then that you hadn't been safe and sound, singing in a Swiss tavern all along. At least not the whole time.  He wanted to know what had really happened back in '42...but that wasn't part of the deal.

"No questions asked, little lady. You help us, we help you."

He could see softening in your eyes. He knew he was getting to you. "You know who we are, dontchu, little lady?"

You nodded slightly.

"Then you know this is your chance to get revenge for whatever happened. Time to get your name back. Get home some day...  And maybe rob 'em nazis blind again..."

He saw a flash of a smile in your eyes, and he smiled himself, "So, whaddya say, kid?"

You gunned your drink, and slammed the glass down, and turned to him. Fire in your eyes like there hadn't been for near two years. A devilish grin as you pulled off your black gloves,  "One hundred scalps, chief?"

Aldo smirked, "That's the deal kid."

You nodded, and shook his hand.

Even though the basterds were all within earshot of the bargain, Donny was the only one who kept his mouth shut long enough to listen. They'd all assumed Aldo had just gone over to be 'friendly.'

Donny was the only one jealous enough to listen.

And he regretted it...

He wanted to know why and how Aldo already knew your name. How he knew you were a deserter...

What's more, it infuriated Donny because deserters were cowards to him.

He glanced up as Aldo brought you over to the table, and for a moment, his fury subsided. He saw something in your eyes. A silent story... A mystery that needed to be pieced together.

"Well, boys, this is y/n. She's a basterd if I ever met one."

Everyone started to laugh.

"How drunk are you?"

"Since when are you a light weight?!"

"All that tobacco finally went to your brain, huh boss?"

Aldo cleared his throat, "Maybe I didn't make myself clear enough. This is Private Y/n L/N. You might know her better as the Harpy."

Dead silence fell on the table before there was clamoring for answers.

You were a late legend. You were known for stealing from the nazis to benefit the allies. Tanks, planes, blue prints.  You also went as far as pickpocketing Nazis, and picking locks to raid their homes for any information that would help.

Smitty gasped and managed to blurt out, "You're supposed to be dead!'

Omar rolled his eyes at him, "Great decorum, kid."

Hirschberg shook his head, narrowing his eyes in susoicion, "No...You're supposed to be a POW, that's what I heard."

Hugo nodded slowly. That was what he heard too.

As they baraged you with rumors and questions, Aldo shook his head, "She'll be joining us, but in exchange, no one asks her fucken questions about where she's been, what she's done, and what's done happened to her since she disappeared. Understood?"

Donny glared right at you, and muttered "She's a fucking deserter," before anyone had a chance to say 'yes sir.'

Before anyone turned against you, Aldo smirked, "Now, Donny, a deserter has no intention of ever coming back. But, you leave 'n come back, even after fifty fucken years, it's considered going AWOL. She ain't no goddamn deserter...at least, not anymore. So, Y/n's a basterd, no one asks any questions, understand?"

The boys muttered a less enthusiastic "Yes sir," than he would've liked but, they still agreed.

And Donny now had another piece of the puzzle.

You were the Harpy. Named after the Greek myths known for stealing and torturing a king. Your stealth and skills as a thief confounded the nazi regime for quite some time, until you disappeared.

One piece of the puzzle. But whatever happened between your disappearance and now was a mystery.

Donny never liked mysteries much, they were too draining.

Puzzles took too much time.

He wasn't going to figure you out. Frankly, he had more important things to do, like...killing nazis. He decided that in his eyes you were still a goddamn deserter. You didn't deserve any redemption or even a place among the basterds.

Especially since they'd recently lost Sakowitz, Zimmerman, and Kagan.

Months passed. The Basterd's were planning a stake out outside of a high ranking nazi's cabin.

A shipment of gold and priceless art stolen from Jewish families all over Europe was coming in.

The Basterd's were sent for retribution.

Most of the basterds had started warming up to you by them. Aldo took you under his wing, and sided with you, especially in the beginning when you faced cut-throat coldness and comments from the boys. After a few months, it was more welcoming... Hugo at least acknowledged your existence....

But Donny refused to speak to you unless it was absolutely necessary. He never trusted you, and it had gotten in the basterds way quite a few times. This time, it was especially annoying. Donny almost let you get your cover and your head blown.

It wasn't until Smitty spoke up.

Aldo sighed, "Hugo, Omar take the northern side. Em nazi fuckers like to go hunting up there... If they do, you go hunting. Smitty and Hirschberg, road up back west is where they come in. Make sure e'ry nazi drives up makes it to the cabin. Wicki, you n me 'll take the eastern post, make sure none of em get away. Donny-"

Donny's eyes shot wide open... there was only one basterd left he could be teamed up with.

He shook his head, "Aldo, no."

Aldo ignored him, "Donny you and Y/N go down south. Look after each other." He turned to the entire team, "That goes for all of you."

Donny started to protest.... frankly you did too. "But-" You stepped forward, "Lieutenant?"

Aldo turned to Donny, "That's an order, boy." He turned to the boys. "Look after each other. All of you. You're a goddamn team. Germans, former deserters, and young 'uns, we're all basterds here. Trust each other, it's how we survive. Understood?" "Yes sir." Aldo nodded, "We meet back here at midnight, take out everyone we didn't get to.  Plan everything else from there. Move out."

Donny trudged through the woods. As everyone split up.  He muttered under his breath about you being a deserter.

You stopped.

"Sir."

"Yeah?" He turned around in a huff.

"South's that way." You pointed opposite of the way Donny was going. He sighed and followed you, muttering atrocities under his breath.

He refused to work with you, or even trust you at all, even after making a name for yourself among the one and only basterds. Still, you couldn't blame him.. But you also knew there was  a limit to these things. Everyone else learned to trust you, but he was a tough one.

The problem with him not trusting you was that the basterds depended on each other to survive.

Aldo knew that. Being a bit older and a tiny bit more mature, he knew something else too. He smirked as he turned around and saw you and Donny disappear beyond the trees together. Aldo was pleased with how he split up the basterds.

Wicki sounded a bit concerned, "They're gonna kill each other, Aldo."

Smitty sighed, just before parting from his corporal and lieutenant,  "If they haven't already..."

Aldo smirked, "Nah... there's more to it than that."

Smitty didn't quite understand, but he didn't take the time to question it. He ran off into the woods to find Hirschberg.

Wicki raised his eyebrow for a moment, then understood with a sly grin, and followed his lieutenant.

Meanwhile, you and Donny were hidden, watching the cabin from the southern post.

"You keep fucking groaning like that and you'll blow our cover."

Donny shook his head, audibly and visibly annoyed, "Fuck off."

Immature as it was, you had no other way to respond, "You fuck off."

"I'm your-"

You rolled your eyes, "Sergeant, I know, I know. But I'm a basterd now. I've been paying off my debt to Aldo. I'm back in the war. I know I fucked up, but gimme a chance sarge. Not for me but for the team's goddamn sake."

Donny put his gun down for a moment and looked at you, and for that moment you had some hope.

Instead he remarked, "I don't know you, I don't like you."

"You don't have to like me.-"

"I know Aldo says to trust you, but I'm not gonna trust a goddamn deserter." He sighed, thinking more about his responsibility to the team. You were right, and he'd never admit it... He sighed. "Alright kid. If I trust you, then you gotta trust me back."

You clenched your jaw. Your heart skipped a beat.

You don't know what possessed  you to set your rifle down, and look your sergeant in the eyes. You rolled up your sleeves, pulled your hair away from your shoulders. "Last time  I trusted someone I got this." You pulled down your collar and he saw a scar from a nazi's machete.

But that wasn't what caught his eye.

It was the numbers etched into your skin with ink.

Donny had long doubted that you had been a POW. He believed you'd just deserted, and used the rumors as a scapegoat for some saving grace...

But you'd unintentionaly confirmed the rumor.

Everything changed in that moment to him.

He was silent, and looked away.

He nodded, picked his gun up,  and looked back at the cabin in the distance.

"Alright... alright kid.  I trust you. All you gotta do is follow orders."

You nodded, "I'm a soldier. It's what I do."

Donny nodded and looked back through the trees.

You sat in silence for what seemed like a thousand nights.

It had only been about twenty minutes.

Donny heard shuffling beside him, and looked at you. You'd picked up a pistol. One not given to you by the basterds...

Or even the military.

Donny knew it wasn't standard issue. He was absolutely shocked as you followed your gaze, back to the cabin where a 1943 bugatti pulled up, and a few nazis walked up to the door.

You shut one eye and cocked your head to the side.

Donny eyes widened and he pushed your gun down, "What're you doing?! You're gonna blow our fucking cover!"

"That's colonel Landa."

Donny narrowed his eyes in confusion... "Ok, and?" To him, a nazi was a nazi. He didn't care about their names or their ranks. They were all inhuman piles of fiflth, spat out by hell.

You sighed, and sat back. Your jaw tense, your heart racing as flashes from the POW camp came back to haunt you, deafening you, taking your eyes two years back.

You wanted it to stop...

You raised your hands up to the back of your head, and squeezed it, trying to ground yourself. You shut your eyes, as the ground beneath your knees seemed to shake, along with your breath.

Donny's eyes fell on the numbers scratched into your skin, and in that moment, he understood exactly who Hans Landa was.

But the basterds were still in danger.

They still had a mission. Aldo's orders were still orders. And you were still a soldier.

It wasn't time...

"Stand down, private."

You looked him in the eyes, "Let me take this shot, sarge. Just this one shot."

"Stand down. That's an order."

You shut your eyes, and let your gun fall to the damp moss beneath you.

Your pistol was yours alone. And the bullet in it belonged to Hans Landa. His name was engraved on it.

Your gaze was steely, cold, and distant  as you watched Landa laughing on the porch, a drink in his hand, surrounded by his friends.

All nazis...

You couldn't stop looking until they went back inside.

Then you heard shuffling...You looked, and  saw that Donny had sat by you. He looked down, but asked, "This is about revenge, isn't it, kid?"

"That's what all this has been about." You eyed the nazi dogtags Donny hung around his neck as trophies.

Donny cleared his throat, "Your gun's not standard issue."

"Neither is your bat."

He smiled a little as he glanced at it, "You're right..."

You were quiet again, and he could see the rage in your eyes.

"Hey..."

"Yeah?" Your eyes never broke away from the cabin.

"If it were up to me, I woulda let you take that asshole down...But we can't blow everyone's cover, right now." He sighed, remembering a similar mistake that cost Simon his life not too long before. "Not now, ok?"

"Got it, chief." You took a steady breath, remembering you were a soldier, nothing more. "Orders are orders..."

Donny looked down, an unexpected wave of sympathy washing over him. "You'll get your revenge some day, kid. I promise."

"Yeah..."

He looked at you, and smiled softly, "You know...the best revenge is when you go home, knowing that you live in a world without them."

You sighed, and nodded, as you sat back and watched the cabin. Noting which nazis arrived.

At midnight, you reconvened with the basterds and made a plan.

Only one nazi made it out that night and it was Hans Landa.

You kept quiet about it, not wanting all the basterds to know why it bothered you specifically.

Donny just leaned in and spoke softly... Something a basterd from Boston didn't do quite often, "I'm sorry, kid. You'll get him some day."

In that moment, all you wanted was revenge. You thought you were sure of that.

A year passed... There was something more that you wanted.

And you realized that during Operation Kino...

To be continued...

[sushisama]

A Bloom in the Fields

Pairing. Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku Rating.  Pretty tame, but there is a few limey parts.  Content Warning. Character deaths. Synopsis.  The lives of the wolf Bakugou Katsuki and the ram Midoriya Izuku after their first chance meeting. Notes.   I still wanted to do a Halloween fic, but the Haunted House stories felt complete.  Then this sprung to mind, and I just rolled with it.  Hopefully you’ll roll with it, too.

Hope you enjoy!

When Bakugou Katsuki was a pup, he caught his first sheep.

He attempted to bring the green mess of wool back to his family den, but catching something doesn't mean killing it.  The sheep bleated and kicked, until he freed himself from Katsuki's too mall of maul.

They had a standoff that lasted into the sunset.  The field they ran in was in was on the edge of the wood but on the other side of human lands.  Katsuki chased him around, keeping him from the close farmlands and trying to get him to the wood where he knew he would have advantage.  However the lamb was fast and good at changing directions.  It took everything for Katsuki to keep up with him.

It was almost like when he played with the other pups in his pack.  He forgot that he was chasing food at some point, and he became keener on catching him in some elaborate game of tag.  He found the sentiment returned when the one time he caught him, he released him almost immediately.  He stood in front of him, tail wagging and tongue out of his mouth as he panted.  His eyes were on him, expectant as he watched the green eyes reading him.

The sheep bleated and charged toward him.  He barked out a laugh and turned, giving way to chase.

The moon was high in the sky when the two finally tired of their chase and fell onto the field, panting.  The sheep chewed on grass, and Katsuki found a rabbit to eat.  It was clear he trusted his chances when he provided his name: Midoriya Izuku.

Katsuki scoffed but gave his own.

"So you aren't going to eat me?"

Katsuki shrugged.  The grass was comfortable in the spot he found, and he hadn't moved from it since finishing his meal.  "Too full now."

Izuku chuckled.  "Good to know."  He was lying close, he knew, but he was obstructed by the tall grass.

Katsuki clicked his tongue.  "I'll just get you later."

"What makes you think I'll be easy to find again?"

"I'll go and steal you," he retorted.  "I'm not afraid of any farmers."

"You don't think I'm an Owned, do you?"

Katsuki tried to glance at him, but could only make out some of the green.  "You weren't wearing a collar, so I guess not."

There was a bit of a rustle.  "My mother was talking about it," he said.  "The farmer over the hill only makes wool."

"So he says."

"He’ll keep us safe from wolves."

Katsuki grinned.  "My pack steals from him all the time."

"You're just saying that," Izuku retorted, though his voice was clearly unsure.

He snickered.  He sat up and made his way closer to Izuku.  "Do you think you'll be safe from me?"  He found him through the high grass.  He was on his knees and hands, almost like he was stalking him.

Izuku sat up and backed away from him.  "I think I can outrun you," he said.  His voice betrayed the confident look he was trying to force on his face.

"Only for so long."  He was grinning as he lowered himself, ready to pounce.

Izuku started to stand up again, ready to run.  They both stilled as a long haul drifted through the air.  Katsuki cursed under his breath.

"Your dad?" Izuku asked.

"My mom," Katsuki corrected.  "I have to go."  He straightened up.

Izuku nodded and smiled.  "My mom's probably wondering where I am, too."

Katsuki clicked his tongue.  "Whatever.  I'll catch you tomorrow."

Izuku chuckled.  "Not if you can't keep up."

Katsuki smirked.  "We'll see, won't we?"  He turned and headed off, only barely catching wave from the sheep he had been hunting all day.

:: * ~~ * ::

Tag became a new favourite game for Katsuki.

For a long time after their first meeting, Katsuki and Izuku met in the field to chase each other.  The wolf would threaten to eat the sheep, but it lost its bite after the first day.  It was performative at best, a joke at most.

Izuku laughed when he said it.  He then tapped his snout and ran off.

Within months, they were doing more than tag.  Other games became incorporated, and they found themselves seeing each other almost every day.  Even when Katsuki was supposed to be with his pack, or Izuku was supposed to be with his mother, they found each other.

Izuku would bring food some days.  Snacks and drinks so he could keep up with the running around, and every time he would offer some.  Katsuki would turn his nose at the offering, as none of it had meat in it.

How would he enjoy such things?  He barely understood how prey worked at all.

"You should try it," Izuku asked one day.  The sun was crawling down the sky, and they only had moments left together.

Katsuki stared at the cracker covered in cheese.  "Is that from a goat?  Isn't that weird?"

Izuku shook his head.  "Cow," he corrected.  "And it's not weird to share our goods."  He tilted his head a little.

"Do you not do that in your pack?"

Katsuki raised a brow.  What a weird question.  "We hunt together," he said.  "That's all we need."

"Do you cook it?"

"Cook?"

"You know, over a fire?"

Katsuki gave a confused look.  "Like humans do?"

Izuku nodded.  "Like them, yes."  He pushed the cracker closer to Katsuki.  "They cook it with spices and vegetables; sometimes it smells good even to me."

Katsuki took the crack and sniffed it.  What a weird smell.  "Why would you do that to meat?"

"Why make cheese?" Izuku asked in turn.  "Why eat anything besides what you need?"

Katsuki tilted his head.  "Why would you?"

Izuku smiled wider.  "Because it tasted good," he said simply.

Katsuki didn't understand.  What a weird thought process.

But the cheese wasn't so bad.

::*~~*::

The wolf and the sheep grew with the years.

When they were young, it was easy to see each other as often as they could. As the years went on, their priorities changed as their responsibilities changed.  Though it wasn't every day, it was still every week.  The hunts from his pack, the ones Katsuki was no fully part of, went like clockwork.  He could come back to the field the day after a hunt; with his belly full, he could focus more on Izuku.

Izuku would bring a picnic basket every time.  He brought cheeses, vegetables, smoked meats, among other things.  Katsuki would eat them, feigning reluctance, though he had come to enjoy the bounty.

Izuku also brought things like herbs and spices to take home.  Katsuki always scoffed, like he would so something so weird.   But then he would go back to his pack and try cooking, always an experiment that ended in different ways.  Sometimes good, sometimes awful.

A lot of his pack thought it was strange, but his mother encouraged it.   She tried everything he made, honest in her response to how it tasted.   She tried to help, give suggests where she could, but she was new to it as well.  Nonetheless, she bragged about his skill, and she did everything to make it look more favourable to the pack.

Katsuki wanted to bring something for Izuku, but he knew he wouldn't accept the meats.  He couldn't help the disappointment he felt that he couldn't share with him a skill he didn't even know he had without him.  But Izuku was strictly a vegetarian, and it wasn't something Katsuki was even going to start to push.

Katsuki instead brought him a basket of flowers and mushrooms when he could.   The foliage in the woods was much different than in Izuku's pasture.  He started picking them after noticing he ate the flowers all over the field.  He brought the few he could find, and Izuku seemed to enjoy them greatly.

While they ate, they talked about their lives.  They caught up with the drama of getting older and the other relationships in their lives.  Katsuki only had so many friends in his pack, but that was the way he liked it.

Izuku on the other hand had lots of friends.  in his fields, there were more than just sheep, and Izuku went between many of the groups easily.  Katsuki wasn't surprised by any of that.   Izuku was one of the friendliest animals he had ever met.  He was certain he could bring him home, and the pack would love him long before considering eating him.

Much like how Katsuki had.

There were a few names Izuku brought up over and over that made Katsuki's chest tighten.  Of course he had his own repeated names, like Kirishima and Todoroki, but something about his closeness to his friends that made Katsuki almost upset.  There was something in the words that spoke of a bond that went deep that he felt envois of.  Did Izuku ever talk like that about him to his other friends?  Or did he hide him like some shameful secret?

He had told his mother and Kirishima about the sheep.  They thought it was strange at first, but as he spoke of him more, spent more time with him, they came around to the idea of him being with the prey.

Kirishima asked to go with him on more than one occasion.  Each time, Katsuki found a reason for him not to go.  Kirishima was disappointed, but he didn't question his reasoning.  Katsuki was grateful that he didn't push it.  He didn't want to admit his worry of the two meeting, his discomfort at the idea of how well they would hit it off.

It wasn't fair, but Katsuki knew he couldn't compete.  Kirishima was friendly, a good listener, considerate, and in general just a better animal to be around.  How could Katsuki possibly compare to his friend?

No, he needed more time alone with Izuku.  Just enough that he couldn't be easily replaced.  It was selfish, he knew.  But he couldn't bring himself to do it all any other way.

There were gifts for birthdays.  Izuku brought shiny things he found from the pastures and put on pieces of leather for him.  Katsuki would hang them in his room in his family's den.  In return, he used the wood carving hobby he had taken up to make beads for his hair and fur.

When his horns grew in, he made jewellery that jingled as he walked.  Izuku said he loved wearing them: the sound made him think of Katsuki, that he was always there.  Katsuki scoffed at the statement, but hid the flush that crossed his cheeks.

Holidays were spent together.  The seasons changed, and they gave their offerings to their different yet still so similar gods.  The year started with a light festival to welcome in the warm weather, and a planting holiday to wish for good crops and hunting.  As the year went, they celebrated the longest day of the year and harvests.  When fall came, so did the Thinness and remembering those who had based.

Winter solstice Izuku had to celebrate on his own.  When fall was turning into winter and the weather was getting colder, the pack kept to their hollow, staying together for warmth and safety from the snows.  When the light festival came was the first the wolf would come back to the sheep, and the year started again.

Every spring they planted bushes and made a garden in the parts of the field closer to the woods but still in the sun.  In the fall, they harvested things together, and Izuku would help Katsuki preserve meat for the coming winter.

An apple tree grew stronger every year.  They planted it from a handful of seeds Izuku had spat out after eating an apple.  They nurtured it, making sure it had a splint its first year, as well as plenty of water and food.  Katsuki leave ground bone around it, and Izuku had a more natural but embarrassing way to give the soil nutrients.

By the time it was ready to give apples, they were using it for shade on hotter days.  They could only crawl under it for a time, but soon they were standing and picking fruit.  Katsuki had no use for them, but he loved the smile on Izuku's face as he climbed up to the higher branches for him.

He would pick apples for hours if it meant Izuku would stay.

Every time they met, Katsuki was glad to see that Izuku's mother hadn't gone in to the farmer.  It meant more time they would have together as Freed.  If Izuku became an Owned, it was giving his life away, and soon enough he would be a Mindless.  His life might be good, protected and fed, sheered when his thick hair would inevitably grow too much.

But if the farmer lied, there was no fighting back.  The Mindless would not be able to recognise their fate, nonetheless prevent it.  Katsuki hated to think about that.

So when Katsuki saw the leather strap around his neck, he couldn't help his instant reaction.

"What the hell is that!?"

"Katchan, let me explain--"

"Explain!?" Katsuki got closer, pulling on the front loop.  Izuku gasped and flung forward at the tug.  "There is no good explanation!  All this does is--!"

"I know!"  Izuku's eyes watered.  He took Katsuki's hands and kept him close.  "But they've been threatening to raze our pastures.  What are we supposed to do!?"

Big tears started to fall down his cheeks.  "We need land!  The farmer is the only with any around, any safe land.  Not like so many of us could get so close to the woods."

Katsuki frowned at the statement.  He was right, of course.  If they got pushed farther toward the woods, there would be no guarantee that the pack and other predators wouldn't go after them.  He could vie for the protection of Izuku and his mother, but he doubted they would take such pity on the rest.  Not without a good reason to.

But he still couldn't see him become a Mindless.  He wouldn't have it.

Katsuki brought him closer so he could get a better grip on the collar.

"What- what are you doing?"

"Taking this stupid thing off of you."

"Katchan!"  Izuku tried to pull at his hands, but Katsuki's determination was stronger.  "If I come back without this--"

"What will they do?"  Katsuki undid the clasp and started to pull it off him.  "Just put another one on?"

"That's probably it."

Katsuki pulled the collar off him.  "Then I'll take that one off, too."  He held the leather triumphantly.  "I'll take off as many as the put on you."

Izuku touched the area on his neck.  He eyes the collar a moment before looking up at Katsuki.

"No matter how many times?" He asked softly.

Katsuki nodded, his eyes full of determination.  "If it gets too many," he started, wrapping the leather around his wrist, "I'll just steal you instead."

Izuku laughed.  "Steal me?"

Katsuki's look was serious.  "They can't have you," he said.  "I already claimed you."

Izuku's cheeks reddened.  Katsuki had taken a step back, but the sheep was still close.  "Claimed me?"  He ran a finger over the leather.  "Do you still have plans to eat me?"

Katsuki clicked his tongue.  "Better me than some human, right?"

Izuku chuckled.  "I guess so."

Katsuki pulled on his wrist, bringing him a bit closer.  "Then come find me when they put the next one on," he commanded.  "I'll wait every morning here, in case you need me."

"Katchan."

"I'm being serious."

Izuku smiled and moved into him, tucking his head under his chin.  Katsuki tensed at the sudden touch, but didn't move him.

"I know you are," Izuku said as he nuzzled under his chin.  "But my mother...."

"She shouldn't wear one either."

"It isn't so simple."

"It is."

Izuku sighed.  "What should we do?  Take the farmer's land?"

Katsuki grinned.  "That sounds great," he agreed.  "You all do the farmer's work.  You only need his land, not him!"

Izuku rolled his eyes and smirked.  "Okay, Katchan.  We'll get right on it."

Katsuki pulled him close again.  "I'll do it then."

Izuku didn't push away, but sank into his arms.  "And when you get caught?"

"I won't."  He nuzzled into Izuku's fluff.  "And whoever goes with you, I'll tell the pack they can't have you."

"You don't have that authority."  He put his arms around him.

Katsuki felt his heart beat faster.  They had hugged plenty of times (mostly it was Izuku doing it to him), but this was different.  This was somehow... closer.

"Make it worth our while," he said.  "Keep other hunters away.  We only eat those of you that get too close and we're hungry.  We prefer Mindless."

"That why you chased me?" Izuku asked with a chuckle.  

Katsuki scoffed.  "I was a pup," he said.  "I thought it would make me look good."

"Would it?"

"Not at all."  He laughed.  "You also would have been a shitty meal."

Izuku laughed and squeezed him.  "Mom says I've always been small."

"Your wool would be more useful than your meat."

"...would you like a blanket?  Or a sweater?"  Izuku buried his head in his chest, but Katsuki still saw his flushed cheeks.  "For winter this year...."

Katsuki hummed.  "Did you really get sheared enough for that?"

"My mother makes plenty of things out of our wool every year," he said.  "Especially since I got bigger."

"Only a little bigger."

Izuku pushed on him playfully.  "I still make plenty of wool!" He defended.   "I get sheared at least three times every summer now."

Katsuki snickered.  "At least you'll have one thing to sell after you take the farmer's land."

They parted, sitting down to start on their picnic.

"Don't you think the townsfolk will notice he's gone?" He asked around some daffodil spirits Katsuki had made him.  "I doubt they'll want to with any Freed."

"Maybe that'll change."

"When they find we've killed the farmer?"

"No, no, I'm killing the farmer, you guys are just making sure the land is in good hands."

Izuku rolled his hands.  "It will work out so well."

Katsuki nodded.  "Better than being a Mindless."

Izuku didn't disagree with this.

For a few weeks after, Izuku came with more collars.  Each time, Katsuki took them all, ripping them off and putting them up his arms.  He confessed that he was stealing the ones from his mother, so he had no right to get mad at his wolf friend's intentions.

Then when winter was coming, Izuku came without a collar: Katsuki came with blood around his mouth.

They didn't discuss it.  It was never brought up, even as Izuku cleaned his muzzle.  He gave him a sweater, and Katsuki feigned reluctance to wear it.  He persuaded him with a blanket as well.

It was the first time Izuku kissed him on the mouth.  He had kissed him on the face several times before, and Katsuki had licked him a few times as well.  But this was different, a very welcomed difference, that they shared even as the fall winds picked up.

Katsuki was warm that winter, under his blanket and dreaming of visiting Izuku on the farm in spring.

::*~~*::

Katsuki had kept his word.  The pack worked with the animals who had taken the farm and come to a truce.  The wolves protected the farm in exchange for free reign over their former fields and pastures.  The shared resources, trading things in their woods for crops and leathers and wools.

It wasn't unheard of for such alliances to exist, but it was rare.  Nonetheless it was still working well for them.

The pack and the farm had freedom to walk between territories as long as they all behaved.  With this rule, Katsuki was at the farm often, helping Izuku with his chores.  No one said anything or questioned their closeness.  Some of them saw their stolen affections, but there was no reason to bring it up.

There was no harm in their relationship, Katsuki mother had told the pack.  Their intimacy had brought both groups fortune.  And Katsuki wasn't required to bring more pups into the pack, so it wasn't really that big of a deal.

In private, she did ask that if something were to happen, to make sure it wouldn't hurt the alliance that had been forged.

Katsuki scoffed.  Like something would happen to them.

Katsuki had become more confident in his relationship with Izuku. They were close, close enough that others referred to them as mates.  Neither one had said anything, but they didn't disagree.  It helped in a way to keep others from trying to mate with Izuku, which was good for Katsuki.  It meant no unnecessary fighting from Katsuki.

They were able to meet each other's friends as well.  Katsuki's selfishness had waned, and his need to kepp Izuku to himself felt less important.  Their status among the pack and farm was known to everyone, and no one was out to interfere.

It was actually nice to share his time.  Kirishima liked him and approved of their union almost as much as his mother did.  Izuku's friends were a little more reluctant to accept him at first, but eventually came around.  In the end, Katsuki expanded his friend base, something he had never expected to do.

There was only one thing left for them, a taboo that they only discussed a few times.  They snuck off at night to lie together under the apple tree.  Izuku would lay on Katsuki's chest, nuzzling into his fur.  Most nights, they were under one of the wool blankets his mother had knit.

On the colder nights, they came close to it.  They were almost in each other's clothes, trying to stay warm, and the contact was too much.   They touched, kissed, and more; everything but the final act.  But it was close.  It was always close.

It was after winter one year where it came to be too much.  Izuku had missed him too much when he was spending the winter deep in the woods with his pack, and Katsuki had dreamt of him the entire time.  Their first time seeing each other was in their field, where the blossoms had just started.

They came together under their tree.  Izuku marvelled at his thick coat and Katsuki went on about how long and curled his horns were getting.  As it did, it led to more.  Katsuki to relearned his body, mark him with his scent.  Izuku had no objections, even when he bit the back of his scruff.

Izuku got on all fours, letting Katsuki push him into the tall grass.  The sounds the sheep made drove him crazy.  He went forward, where they would normally stop, and Izuku didn't stop him.  He presented himself, opening himself for Katsuki almost naturally.

He wasn't as rough as he had been in his dreams.  With Izuku there, in the flesh and fluff, Katsuki found himself to be gentle.  It no longer mattered if just he felt good, but he wanted Izuku to feel good as well.  And he thought by his soft bleating, he was enjoying it.

When it was over, and they were both coming down from the euphoria, Katsuki realised he was stuck.  He cursed himself, forgetting something so important in his desperate need to be close to his mate.  Izuku squirmed beneath him, mentioning the discomfort and wanting to change positions.

"I can't," Katsuki said.  He was moving, trying his best to make it more bearable for the both of them.

"What do you mean, 'you can't'?"  Izuku squirmed under him.  "I love you, but please get out."

Katsuki stopped moving as his words sunk in.  "You what?"

"Katchan!"  Izuku bucked back, earning a loud, pained groan from Katsuki as he couldn't budge.

"Hold- hold on, stop moving."  He pushed down on his should to keep him still.  "Look, I'm sorry, I got excited, I forgot--"

"Forgot?"  Izuku moved again, reaching back, and a shudder went through him as he moaned.  "Are you bigger?"

"It's... fuck, okay, it's just how we work, okay?"  Katsuki was finally able to get him to stop moving, but it wasn't a very comfortable position.  "It's meant to make sure it, you know... takes."

"I took it already," Izuku said.  He sighed.  "How long is it going to be like this?"

"I don't know," Katsuki answered.  "You know this is my first time, right?"

"Mine, too," Izuku reminded.  "Would have been nice to know what would happen, though."

Katsuki sighed.  He nuzzled into the wool of the back of his neck.  "I'm sorry," he repeated.  "I got caught up in all of this.  It's been too long, I just wanted to be close to you..."

Izuku looked at him over shoulder.  "I wanted to be close to you, too."  He pushed up and leaned back.

"Wait, wait."

Katsuki grunted as Izuku sat back, forcing him into a sitting position, the sheep in his lap.  Katsuki buried his face in the wool as Izuku adjusted, sitting down on him fully.  He put his arms around his waist, holding him from moving more than he was.

"Stop moving as much."

"This is more comfortable."

"Yeah, but..."

Izuku looked back at him, brow raised.  "Does that hurt?"

"It doesn't hurt, just might... get... invested again."

Izuku put his hands on his arms and gave him a light squeeze.  "You would really want to...?"

Katsuki grumbled against his fur.  "Sorry, it's just... I know I shouldn't be, I missed all of you..."

Izuku leaned back to nuzzle Katsuki's jaw.  "I was thinking about it, too..."

"Yeah?"

He nodded.  "Winter would have been warmer..."

Katsuki held him tightly.  "...did you mean it?"

"Mean what?"

"That you love me."

Izuku settled himself fully into Katsuki's hold, tucking into his neck.  "Of course I do," he said simply.  "Did you ever think otherwise?"

Katsuki shook his head and nuzzled into his fluff.  "No, I thought so, just the first time I've heard you say it."

"Do you?"

"What?"

"Love me."

Katsuki clicked his tongue.  "Of course, idiot."  He nipped at his ear.  "Why else would I put up with you?"

Izuku chuckled. He kissed him just under the chin.  "I think I have more of a right to say that than you."

Katsuki scoffed and bit him a little harder, getting a yelp from Izuku.

"How much longer?"

Katsuki shrugged.  "I told you, I'm not sure."

"All to make sure I have your pups, right?"

Katsuki squeezed him a little.  "You wish," he said, though there was something in his tone.  "Maybe I want to just cover you in my scent."

"What about mine?"

Katsuki blinked.  "Your scent?"

Izuku nodded.  "You could do with smelling like me."

Katsuki laughed.  "Sure, fine.  Not like I don't usually smell like you anyway."

Izuku hummed.  "Not enough," he remarked.

"What would you suggest?"

"Well, this has been a good start..."

"This will happen every time," Katsuki mentioned.  Izuku made a soft noise as Katsuki rocked up into him.

Izuku rubbed up his arms, scratching through his fur.  "I think it's worth it," he said.  "Just should try to end a little.... different."

"I'll be more careful," Katsuki said.  "I won't let myself go like that again."

Izuku kissed under his chin.  "Now, don't say that...."

Katsuki rolled his eyes but smiled.  He gave a small kick, toppling them bother over so they laid on their sides, his arms tight around him.  Izuku yelped but soon was laughing.  They cuddled close, happy with their proximity despite the situation.

:: *~~* ::

It was the dead of night when the townspeople came to the farm.

The pack wasn't even aware of the invasion until it was well under way.   Izuku and a couple of others ran into the woods, bleating and undulating loudly to get the wolves' attention.  They all came from their dens, ready to see what was bothering their neighbours.

By the time Izuku found Katsuki, a good deal of carnage was done.  Many of the farm had been killed or Collared.  They had come so suddenly, there was little time to fight back, not like they knew how to in the first place.

The townspeople had left them alone for years.  They still got what they needed from the farm, even if it was clear they didn't like it.  Maybe they didn't like the disappearance of the farmer, but when it was never proven the animals had anything to do with it, they begrudgingly worked with them.

(Months later, Katsuki would learn a distant family member of the farmer had come back to find the state of the farm.  He got the town whipped up into a frenzy, and they launched their attack seemingly out of nowhere.)

The reason wasn't important at the time.  What mattered was saving all the animals they could and push back the humans.  It wasn't an easy task: they came with weapons including guns, and there was little they could do.  The focus came more on saving who they could.

Fighting could wait for another day.

Katsuki helped round up everyone he could, Izuku at his side.  They weren't the only ones; Kirishima was nearby, herding who he could.  His mother and father were distracting them, keeping them away from the woods as the others shepherded them to the woods.

The pair made sure a good amount got to the forest before turning back to get more.  They were stopped, just inside their field, by a small group of humans.  Two had pitchforks and one had a gun, readied at them.   Katsuki growled, eager to tear into them.

Izuku was at the ready to fight as well.  Katsuki hadn't expected him to be so willing, normally one for a negotiating route, but he must have known, understood the severity of the situation.  There was no talking to them, nothing that they would hear.  They only saw them as beasts, lower than them, and needing to be tamed, and if not tamed, slaughtered.

Katsuki went after the one with a gun, knowing him to be the biggest threat.   He had butted his stomach before going for his neck.  The surprise gave him an advantage, and his fangs found their way into his throat.  It wasn't the first human he had killed, and if the night went on the same way, he was sure it wouldn't the last.

When the human was down, Katsuki came to Izuku's side to help with the other two only to find one down and the other locked with a pitchfork in Izuku's horns.  Katsuki made quick work of downed human, ripping his throat out.  He attacked the one in combat with the sheep from behind, throwing him off guard.

Together, the human was dispatched with relative ease.  The wolf and sheep stood over the body, breathing heavily, their eyes glazed over.  Everything was gone and for a moment, all Katsuki could feel was Izuku next to him, and all else faded away.  He had a span of time where he forgot what was happening, that there were more humans to dispose of and animals to save.  All there was in his mind was Izuku.

The façade was broken as Izuku slumped to the ground.

"O-oi!"

Katsuki kneeled down next to him, looking over him.  It wasn't easy to find it, but as his paws went over wool, Izuku winced when he got toward his abdomen.  He pulled away, blood on his fingers.

"Katchan..."

"Stay still."

Katsuki nuzzled his cheek.  "I'm going to get someone," he said, trying to hide the emotion in his voice.  "Try not to make any noise."

"Katchan, wait."  He gripped to his arm, keeping him from going.  "Don't... please, stay..."

Katsuki squeezed his hand and removed his hand from him.  "I have to get someone," he insisted.  "I can't waste any time."

Izuku whined.  He looked up at him, tears welling in the corners of his eyes.  "You'll be quick?"

Katsuki nodded.  "The quickest."

Izuku made another soft noise.  He rolled into his side, a soft gurgle coming from his throat.  Katsuki was tempted to stay, or at least pick him up, but he was sure that was ill advised.  There was so much blood, and he wasn't sure where any of it was coming from.  Moving him might cause him to into shock, from the little knowledge he knew of medicine.

"I'll come back," Katsuki whispered.

Izuku made a low sound, though Katsuki wasn't sure if it was words or not.   He stayed only a breath more before leaving him hidden in the high grass.

The farm was almost devoid of animals.  Katsuki looked for the old ewe, the one who knew about medicine, the one who took care of them when they were sick, but couldn't find her.  Humans had won the battle, and had started to ransack the farm.  They were pulling up crops and running away with carcases.

The hatred would lead them to steal Freed, if not eat them from some of the conversation they were having.  How disgusting of them.

He would punish them later for it.

Katsuki rounded back to the forest, exploring the trees.  After sniffing the air and using it to find the trail, he came across Kirishima and several animals he had led to safety.  Among them was the old ewe he was looking for as well as Izuku's mother and a couple of his close friends.

"You," he said as he got closer to the group, his eyes on the healer.  "Come with me."

"Oi!  You have no right to be making demands like that!"  The booming voice came from the bull Iida.  "This is not the time—"

"Izuku is hurt," Katsuki explained to the ewe, ignoring Iida fully.  His tone was getting desperate as he added: "Please."

The older animal nodded.  "Of course," she said.  "Take me to him."

Katsuki turned, leading back to the field.  The group followed him, Izuku's mother right at his side.

"What happened?" Ink asked in a rush.  "How did he get hurt?"  There was something accusing in her tone.

"We fought some humans," Katsuki answered.  "I... I'm not sure exactly when or how, but it looks like they got him at—"

"What do you mean you don't know?" she interrupted.  "You're supposed to be watching him!  It's your responsibility to protect us!  To protect him!"

Katsuki winced at the words.  She was right.  Izuku was his mate, it was his duty to keep him safe.  He not only failed him, but he was the catalyst for all of this.  He killed the farmer, he insisted they take over the farm.

This was entirely his fault.  He wouldn't be surprised if Ink was going through the same thoughts.

They came to the field quickly enough.  Katsuki showed them to Izuku, still close to the apple tree where he had fallen.  He stepped closer to help in any way he could, but found himself shoved out by Iida and Uraraka.

He glared at them.  "Get out of my way."

"You've done enough," Iida said.

Uraraka stayed put.  "Let Mother Recovery work."

Katsuki growled.  "Move."

"Leave," came Inko's voice.  She stepped between the two, tears in her eyes.  "You need to go."

"I'm not leaving."  He hated speaking to her with such a tone, but he refused to just abandon his mate.  "I'm not leaving Izuku."

"You've already left him!" Inko cried.  "When you let this happen!  You brought this on us!  You!"

"All I did—"

"C'mon, we should go," Kirishima said, pulling Katsuki's arm.

"No, I'm not going!" Katsuki shouted as he wrenched his arm away from him.  "I'm not leaving Izuku!  I won't!"

Inko's expression was hard on him.  "You didn't protect him," she said.  "Or us.  We are done with your pack."

"Wait, let's not get ahead of ourselves," Kirishima interjected.

Iida stepped up to Kirishima, forcing the wolf to take a step back.  "It can be revisited later, but I would have to agree.  The consequences have not been worth it."

"You would have been Mindless otherwise," Katsuki reminded him.

"Maybe that would have been better," Uraraka said.

"You can't be ser—"

"I need quiet!" Mother Recovery yelled out, hidden in the tall grass.

Katsuki moved forward again, to be pushed back once more by Iida.  Kirishima pulled on him again.

"We'll see him later," he whispered into his ear.  "Fighting them now does nothing.  We need to make sure everyone else is safe, anyway."

Katsuki growled but let himself be led away as the others watched them go.

"I should be with him," Katsuki grumbled.  "He's my mate!  I should be with him!"

"They aren't going to see it that way right now," Kirishima replied.  They were heading back to the farm.  "That isn't the right battle for you to be fighting at the moment."

Katsuki didn't respond.  He may have been right, but he didn't completely care.  He only thought of the blood on Izuku's wool.

"We'll get him when he's better," Kirishima said.  "Even if it means convincing him to stay with the pack, whatever you want to do."

The farmhouse came into view.  He stopped to give Katsuki a serious look.

"But that's for later.  We need to do this now."

Katsuki growled but nodded.  "I'm not letting this go."

"I don't expect you to," Kirishima said.  "And neither does he."  He turned back to the farm.  In the distance, they could see humans.

Katsuki watched this with a furrowed brow.  He licked his maw, still covered in blood.

"Let's get this over with."

::*~~*::

The farm was never returned to the animals.

The humans had not only taken it back, but had forced collars on any animal they found.  Some were lucky enough to get away with the help of the pack, but that was only a handful of the many.  So many were lost, only to become Mindless.  Many of them were slaughtered afterwards, leaving a scant few in the reclaimed fields.

The saved animals didn't stay with the pack more than a day.  Their trust in their safety had faded, and there was nothing keeping them faithful to the wolves with the loss of the farm.  They didn't say where they were going, but it was the last time the pack saw them.

Katsuki tried his best to get to Izuku before they left, but none would talk to him.  Uraraka and Iida blatantly ignored him, turning and walking off. Inko started to cry when he brought up her son, and Mother Recovery just shook her head.

None of them would speak to him about Izuku, none would tell him where his mate was.  He was growing in anger, but by the time he was going to do anything about it, they were all gone.

His mate with them.

Katsuki was inconsolable for months.  During that time, the pack had to fight off humans and hunters, all coming for their territory.  Part of it was retaliation for the night they invaded the farm, but the reason hardly mattered.  They defended the woods, something they hadn't done in years, they hadn't needed to do in years.

The humans were brash with their attack.  But the wolves were ready for them.

When Katsuki had found the farmer's relative, he dragged him into the forest.  A few days later, there was a scarecrow along the path leading from the village to the woods.

The humans never bothered them again.

Katsuki kept himself occupied as best he could.  He had not seen Izuku since that night, and his absence was more than hard on him.  He did not understand life without his mater, not after building so many years around it.  No matter what the pack did, the comfort they tried to bring him, it didn't seem enough.  They just could not bring him out of his funk.

Every day, he went to the field to wait for Izuku.  He had made fertiliser from the dead humans, and used it to help grow their apple tree as well as a cherry tree he planted.  He hoped the new life would bring him back.  He tended to them both as well as all the flowers he planted along the field.  They were various ones Izuku had enjoyed eating.

Maybe if he showed he was thinking about him, he would come back.  Anything to bring him back.

The seasons changed and time went by.  Katsuki was alone as the year rolled on and got closer to the winter months.  He made stores of the flowers and fruits, leaving them under the trees in obvious spots.  Something Izuku would hopefully find while he was hibernating, to know how he still felt.

Fall came in with a chill.  Katsuki wore his sweaters every day as he made his way to the field.  The days were getting colder, ever close to the last holidays of the year.  The last harvest one had come and gone, and it was getting to the day to celebrate those who had gone.

More than the skies were getting thinner.

Katsuki stilled as he came to the field as the sun was raising in the sky.  The shock of green wool stood out against the dying grass.

He dropped the basket he was carrying, racing to the figure.  He tackled the firm body, the body that was certainly there for the first time in months.

"K-katchan!"  Hands came up, trying to keep him away as Katsuki licked over his face.

He didn't smell like him, he didn't smell like anything.  He had to fix it, to cover him in his scent again.

"Where have you been?" Katsuki asked.

"I've been here," Izuku answered.  He looked up, meeting Katsuki's gaze.  "Katchan, I'm always here."

Katsuki frowned.  "I've been here every day," he said.  "You haven't been here."

Izuku took his face in his hands.  "You never saw me, did you?"

"What are you talking about?"  Katsuki shook his head.  "Doesn't matter: you're here now."  He leaned in to lick him again.

Izuku chuckled and nuzzled against him.  "I missed you, too, Katchan."

Katsuki kept his body close to him, his arms around him as he pulled him into his lap.  "Are you sick?" he asked.  "You're so cold."

Izuku tucked himself into his hold, resting under his chin.  "I'm fine," he said.  "I'm just happy to feel you again."

Katsuki ran his hands over his back, trying to warm him up.  "I'm glad you're here."  He kissed over his face.  "Were you with your mother?  You weren't with her when she left."

"I told you: I was here."

Katsuki frowned.  "What the fuck do you mean by that?"

"Katchan, can we just enjoy this?"  He kissed under his chin.  "I only have so much time."

Katsuki pulled away to look him in the eyes.  "Time?"  The confusion was clear in his voice.  "We have all the time in the world now that you're back."

He held to him a little tighter.  "Please, just come with me, stay with the pack.  No one will bother you: since we're mates, you'll be welcomed."

"I know they would have me," Izuku said.  "And it means the world to me, but things aren't so simple."

Katsuki kissed him softly.  Distantly, he noted even his lips were cold and that his scent wasn't taking, but those were all thoughts and considerations for later.

"It is simple," Katsuki said.  "It is all simple, I mean, no, what happened at the farm wasn't, but this, this can be."

He cupped Izuku's face, his expression serious.  "I love you, you stupid sheep," he said.  "And you're an idiot if you think I'm leaving without you."

Izuku's expression was gentle.  He leaned in to press their foreheads together.  "You don't know, do you, you stubborn wolf?"

Katsuki blinked.  "Know what?"

Izuku shook his head.  "Let's enjoy this," he said again.  "I'm here with you, and right now, that's all that matters."

Katsuki was still unsure what he was getting at, but it didn't matter.  He had Izuku back in his arms, and he couldn't find himself caring about much else.

"Whatever," he finally agreed.  "We'll 'enjoy' the day."

And they did.  It was like the days they had before the farm: catching up and just being close to each other.  The only thing of their recent exploits that was included was a few rounds of mating.  Katsuki enjoyed his company in many ways, only reminding him more how much he had missed his mate.

It stood out to Katsuki that he didn't share in any of the food he had brought.  He made some comment about not being hungry, something easy enough to shrug away.

Izuku continued to be evasive about many things.  Where he had been, where his mother and friends were, what he meant by 'not enough time.'   Everything wasn't making enough sense, but nothing he said could get the truth out of him.

When Katsuki told him about the humans coming into the forest, Izuku was upset.  He had hoped that the pack could just be safe and completely away from the townsfolk.  It had only been an issue for so long, Katsuki affirmed, especially when he had gone after so many of them.

Izuku didn't seem happy with that response either.

The day went by too fast.  The sun was starting to set almost too soon, and Katsuki was thinking of different reasons to get Izuku to come back with him.

"Katchan, I told you, I can't."  Something was lost in his eyes, longing replacing his usual brightness.

"Why?" Katsuki held to him tightly as they cuddled under the apple tree.  "You still won't tell me why.  Is it your mother?  She can—"

"You've said that," Izuku reminded.  "And I still appreciate it."

"Then come back with me."

"If I could, I would.  But I can't."

"But—"

"Will you come tomorrow?"

Katsuki's thoughts stopped at the question.  "Of course," he said quickly.  "I'll be here every day, especially if it convinces you to—"

Izuku put a finger to his lips.  "I think I only have so much time," he said.  "And I'm not sure when it ends.  So please, just come back and see me as much as you can."

Katsuki sighed and nuzzled his nose.  "If that's what you want."  He was still confused by everything he said, but if it meant he got to see him again, that was all that mattered.

"But you will be here tomorrow?" Katsuki asked, just to be sure.

Izuku nodded.  He kissed him softly.  "I'll be here every day until I can't."

"Will you tell me when that will be?"

Izuku hummed.  He furrowed his brow, and didn't answer for a long moment as he seemed to consider something.

"The winter festival," he said.  "I think that would be the furtherst I can stay."

"That... we're normally asleep by then," Katsuki said.  He thought about it.  "But I can stay up."  He took in a deep breath.  "Until you can't."

Izuku smiled softly.  "Don't force yourself."  He said the words, but Katsuki could tell he was grateful for the offer.

"Anything for you," Katsuki said.  "Where... where will you be going after that?  Can you at least tell me that?"

"I already told you, I'll still be here."

"Izuku."

"It's true."  Izuku huffed.  He looked frustrated.  Katsuki was frustrated.   He had no idea what he meant, and his tight lip wasn't helping.

"Whatever."  Katsuki nuzzled under his fluff.  "As long as you're here, I will be, too."

Izuku kissed under his chin.  "Thank you, Katchan."

::*~~*::

Katsuki stayed awake that season longer than he ever had.  It was getting closer and closer to the winter solstice but he made every effort to be at the field every day.  He had to dig into some of his food stores to bring with him, but thankfully they had been bountiful with their hunts.

Not to mention his own private hunts in the village.

His reward for staying from his pack for so long was seeing Izuku every day.  It was similar to their old days still, and worth every moment.  Though things were still strange.  Izuku still didn't eat and he was colder than the snow that was starting to fall.

No matter how many times Katsuki brought it up, Izuku never spoke about this mother or the others.  The pack had been worried and just wanted to know they were okay, but Izuku seemed to not even know where they were.  He seemed concerned, but restrained with how to find out the information Katsuki was looking for.

The questions would always circle around to where Izuku had been and why he didn't go looking for his mother if he wasn't sure where she was.  And Izuku would always give the same, vague answers.

"I've always been here.  I don't know where they went to."

"I can't leave.  I have to stay here."

Katsuki exploded on him one night, too frustrated by the evasiveness of his answers.  It had been such a long time since they fought, especially in such a loud and ferocious manner.  Katsuki simply wanted to understand, simply wanted to know what was being kept from him.  Izuku stood his ground, insistent that what he was keeping to himself was for Katsuki's benefit.

"Please, Katchan."  Izuku's eyes were large and wet, threatening to spill over. "Please, let's just enjoy this.  I don't know if I can come back next year.  I want every second to count."

"Why? Why won't you be here next year?"  Katsuki hated seeing Izuku so upset, but wasn't he allowed his anger?  Wasn't he entitled to the secrets that were being hidden from him?

The moon was coming over the field of dying grass, illuminating the two in the thin layer of snow.  Izuku's tears were obvious in the pale light, but something was off about the rest of him.  His wool almost faded at the ends, disappearing into the evening sky.  The glow around him was almost ethereal, almost unworldly.

He was beautiful, as he had always been, but Katsuki felt a chill looking at him he was sure wasn't from the wind around them.

"Why can't you trust me?" Izuku asked.  His voice was soft, barely about a whisper.  "The answer you're looking for, it will make everything too real.  It might... I don't want anything to chance me not being with you."

Katsuki sighed.  He reached and took Izuku's hands, holding the cold appendages to his chest.  "There's nothing to keep me from you.  I'll find you wherever you go."

This statement only seemed to renew Izuku's tears.  "Don't say that," he said.  "You have no idea what it means."

"It's true," Katsuki said.  "I'll always have you, as long as you'll have me."  He pulled Izuku into his arms for a tight embrace.

"If you don't like where I'll follow, then you have to stay here."

"Katchan, you don't know what you're saying," he sobbed into his chest.  "You don't—"

"Bakugou!"

They both looked up and turned to the voice calling for Katsuki.  He was coming close, by the way his voice was carrying.

"Maybe Kirishima can help convince you," Katsuki said.  "Maybe he can help me get you to the pack."

"Katchan..."  Izuku frowned.  "I've told you, I want to.  I really do..."

"Bakugou, you still out here?"

"Yeah, I am!" Katsuki shouted back.  He pulled away from Izuku, kissing his forehead softly.  He took his hand and turned to start out the field.

Izuku squeezed his hand, but Katsuki was stilled when he wouldn't move.

Katsuki glanced back at him.  "What?  It's just Kirishima."

Izuku had a solemn look on his face.  "Come back tomorrow?"

"Of course, but—"

"Here you are!"

Katsuki turned just as Kirishima emerged into that part of the field.  His friend looked worried, his ears and tail perked up.

"I've been looking for you forever!" he exclaimed.  "Your mom was worried sick, said you kept leaving the hollow every day, and she didn't know why."

"What?  It's obvious why."  Katsuki gestured behind him to Izuku.

Kirishima blinked and looked where he meant.  He looked back at Katsuki, clearly confused.  "The tress are asleep for the season, bro, just like we should be."

Katsuki growled.  Didn't he understand how important this was?  How much it meant for him to have Izuku back?

"Look, I know I don't normally spend the season with him, but this is different."

Kirishima looked more taken aback than before.  "With who?"

"What do you mean with who?"  Katsuki was raising his voice.  "With Izu—"

He pulled on his hand to drag Izuku forward, only to find air in his grip.  He stopped and turned, bewildered by the sudden lack of presence in his fingers.

"— ku."

No one was there.  The wind blew snowflakes in the air where Izuku had just been standing.

"Where the fuck—?"  Katsuki stepped back and started to feverishly look around.  "That stupid sheep!  Where did he go!?"

"Bakugou, no one's been with you," Kirishima  said.  "You were alone the whole time since I found you."

"He was right here!" Katsuki snapped.

"Dude, we haven't seen him since—"

"Why do you think I've been coming here!?"  Katsuki was still looking around.  "Why else than for him!?"

"Bakugou." Kirishima was next to him, taking his arm.  "No one's here."  He started to pull.  "It's getting cold: we need to get back to the hollow."

"But... Izuku..."

Kirishima frowned.  He didn't let go until Katsuki started to follow him back to the forest, albeit reluctantly.

"We'll look tomorrow," Kirishima conceded.  "For now, you need to warm up.  You're freezing."

::*~~*::

Getting back to the field was a taxing effort after that.  Katsuki's mother was keeping a closer eye on him, trying her best to keep him in the hollow.  He got away long enough to see Izuku, but too soon he was being pulled back to the woods.

When his mother came a few days later, Izuku had once more vanished, leaving Katsuki no good explanation for his actions.  He tried to reason with her, explain to her he had to come, had to be with his mate, but she dismissed him.

"I'm not going," Katsuki growled.  "He said he can only stay so long, and I want to be here every moment I can."

"Katsuki, my pup, there is no way you've seen him."  Mitsuki reached for her son, taking the sides of his face so she could keep his eyes on hers.  "I know you're hurting, but this isn't the way."

"What the fuck are you on about, hag?"  Katsuki pulled away from her.  "He's been here!  Why else would I be here!?"

"I don't know why you're here!"  The exhausted tone was clear in her voice.  "I'm trying to figure that out!"

"How many times do I have to say it!?  Izuku!  I'm here to see Izuku!"

Mitsuki's eyes were soft, but the words tore at her.  "Oh, Katsuki... you can't see the dead."

Katsuki's eyes narrowed at the accusation.  "He isn't dead," he retorted through clenched teeth.  "He's been here!  With me!"

Mitsuki took his hands.  "He passed during the attack," she said.  "Inko told me before they left.  Why she wanted gone so quickly."

She looked over his face, and as the confusion fell on his features, her eyes watered.  "I'm so sorry, my pup.  I thought you knew.  You were there, so I thought you were with him when—"

"I wasn't there," Katsuki said.  "They wouldn't let me near him after I got Mother Recovery."

Katsuki's mind was reeling.  There was no way this was really, no way this was true.  He had been with Izuku, physically, and several times.  How could he be dead when he had been with him?

None of it made any sense.

"But... no, no, no." Katsuki moved away from his mother completely.  He gripped his head and shook it wildly, as if it would change the words he was hearing.

When he looked up and toward the apple tree, Izuku was sitting underneath it.  He was staring at Katsuki, a look of regret in his eyes.

"You don't see him, do you?"

Mitsuki watched him a moment before looking way he was.  Her head moved as she searched the area for whatever it was he was staring at.  She looked back, frowning.

"There's no one there."

Katsuki sat down heavily on the ground.  How...?  How was any of this...?

The day Katsuki first saw him came to mind, and where it fell in the year.

"Katsuki, I know your heart is sore."  Mitsuki ran a hand through his hair.  "You lost your mate, and that's hard.  We knew you weren't taking it well, but... I mean, it's you.  We just thought you would ride it out how you needed to."

Katsuki barely heard her.  His eyes were still on Izuku.

"Come here, pup," she went on.  "Come home and let your pack take of you."

He was quiet, not sure what to hold onto.

"Katsuki—?"

"...one moment," he said softly.  "I'll come back, I just... need a moment."

She looked over his face.  "Try not to be long."

He nodded, almost as an afterthought.

Mitsuki nuzzled the top of his head.  "If you take too long, I'll send Eijirou."

Katsuki clicked his tongue.  "Whatever."

Mitsuki ruffled his hair.  "Don't do anything stupid," she commanded softly.  She turned and left him, her steps slow and light.

All the while, Katsuki's eyes were on Izuku, still under the tree.  They kept their eyes locked as they listened for Mitsuki's full departure from the field.  It wasn't until Katsuki was sure she was gone that he stood and made his way to the apple tree.  Still not speaking, he sat back down in front of Izuku.

The silence between them stretched on.  Their eyes were firm to each other, not looking away despite the sounds around them.

"You've been here all along," Katsuki parroted Izuku's most repeated words.

Izuku nodded.  "I have been."

"Since..."

Izuku nodded again.

"You never said anything."

Izuku's smile was bittersweet.  "With everything you did, I knew no one had told you, that you didn't know."

"And no reason to mention it."

"Katchan..."

"Enjoy every moment," Katsuki reiterated.  "Until you can't have them."

Izuku was quiet.

"Is that why only so long?" Katsuki asked.  "Until the Thinness is gone?"

"You couldn't see me until it started," Izuku mentioned.  He ran his finger through the snow, making little patterns.  "I had been screaming for your attention all summer.  But then one day you were jumping on me, and I..."

He looked up at Katsuki, the tears falling.  "I didn't have the heart.  I couldn't tell you the truth."  He put a hand on Katsuki's.  "I just was so happy, and you were so happy."

Katsuki pulled on him, bringing him close.  "I'm happy," he said.  He nuzzled into his fluff.  "I have you back: there's nothing more I wanted."

"But, Katchan, I'm still—"

"Will you be back?  During the next Thinness?"

Izuku wrapped his arms around him, holding him tightly.  "I'll try.  It's not like I know how this all works."

"Well, be here anyway," Katsuki commanded.  "Be here, because I always will be."

"I can't ask you to put life on hold like that."

Katsuki scoffed.  "Not much of a life if you aren't in it."

"Katchan."

"I lived," Katsuki said.  "I lived here and with my pack all summer.  Even seeing you now, I still got my hunting done.  My life has not changed from before because you are still in it."

He looked Izuku in the eyes.

"And I would have it no other way."

"The pack... you're the only one who can see me."  Izuku touched Katsuki's face gently.  "They'll worry about you, just like now."

Katsuki rubbed his back.  "I'll make them understand," he said.  "I'll make it so they don't worry."

He kissed his forehead.  "But I have you now."  He pulled him in again for another tight embrace.

"And I'm never letting go again."

::*~~*::

Katsuki kept his promise for years.

In the spring and summer, he stayed mostly with his pack.  He still went to the field to tend the trees and garden.  He left little things, trinkets and short letters, all to let Izuku his heart was still with him.

Even after Izuku faded with the Thinness, Katsuki was still treating him as if he were there.  There was a change he would go, that he might not come back.  But he didn't care: he knew he was still there, even if he couldn't see him.

He felt him.  That was all he needed.

When the Thinness started, Katsuki spent more time in the field as Izuku came back.  With every year, it seemed surer that Izuku would come back again.

The pack was reluctant to let him go so often.  They found it hard to believe in his reasoning to keep going back, that he was clearly not coping well with the death of his mate.  It wasn't until Kirishima went with him that they seemed willing to believe.

Izuku couldn't show himself to anyone but Katsuki, but he could still move things.  After a few 'trick,' Kirishima left the field believing the sheep was still there, if only in spirit.  He relayed this information back to the pack, and even though it still took some convincing, they finally eased up on Katsuki.  It was clear there was still some concern over his mental wellbeing, but they finally stopping trying to impeded him from going.

Not that it would have stopped him anyway.

Katsuki hunted extra during the year.  He made the meat into jerky to help preserve him during the winter when he was awake and moving more than usual.  Izuku expressed some concern, especially now that he couldn't make him more sweaters and blankets.  Katsuki waved it off, though: he had plenty from when Izuku was still alive.

One year, Katsuki built a small hut in the field, one that safely house a fire.  This appeased Izuku some, especially when he started to fill it with more supplies.  It allowed him to stay on several nights as well, allowing him even more time with Izuku.

Time went on, and Katsuki was content.  Every now and again, he would be reminded that his mate, in reality, was gone.  He would mope and bury himself in his room away from everyone as he quietly mourned his loss.   He would be gone for days, curled into a ball on his bed.

When he was able to move, he came to the field each time.  It was always the spring or summer, so he knew he wouldn't see Izuku's face, but he felt him.  He was there with him.

What was he missing in all honesty?  Half of the year he had him, physically.  The other half, he had his presence.  They were never going to have a litter, so really, what was the difference?

Things were good.  Things moved forward.  And Katsuki was content.

"Katchan should go home."

Katsuki grumbled and inched closer to the fire.  "Not yet."

Izuku frowned.  He was close to him, just barely touching, enough that his cold presence went through Katsuki's body.  He had tried to move away, to keep his frozen essence from his shivering mater, but Katsuki just pulled him closer.

The little hut he had built only did the bare minimum to keep the cold out.  The flooring didn't hold against the temperature, and Katsuki hadn't gotten to fix some holes in the siding before winter came on.  It had come early and swiftly, covering the ground in frost before the last fall festival.  Katsuki wasn't ready for it, but it wasn't going to stop him from being with Izuku.

He kept coming back every day even as snow came in.  There was no day that he wasn't drudging through powder to get to the field.  He was disappointed at how it killed his crops, but there was little he could do about it.

Izuku had grown increasingly worried.  He reminded him that he would be back the next year, it was all right if he stayed in the hollow.  Katsuki ignored it and came back just as often as before.  He just brought more wood for the nights he stayed in the hut.

"The wind s picking up."

Katsuki could hear it.  The gusts felt like it would push over the hut at any moment.  It was barely into the last of the year, and it was as cold as it normally was into the turn of the cycle.  It hadn't been so bad when Katsuki just got to the field earlier in the day, but as soon as the sun started to set, the clouds came in to burst.  They went into the hut to wait the first wave out, but it seemed not to let up.

"You should chance it," Izuku went on.  "Being with the others will be better than being here."

Katsuki huffed.  He looked to Izuku, his brow narrowed.  "I'd rather be here."

Izuku smiled softly.  He wrapped another blanket around his shoulders before leaning against him.  Katsuki could still feel his coldness, but it was lessened through the two blankets.

"Do you have enough wood?  Just in case?"

"It'll work," Katsuki answered.  "Anything outside would be too wet by now."

Izuku nuzzled into him.  "Maybe you should still try..."

"How deep is it now?"

Izuku moved and faded as he stood up.  A moment later, he faded back in, leaning against Katsuki again.

"Probably half a metre."

Katsuki considered this.  "I think it's safer here," he said.  "I just have to—"  

His words were interrupted by a loud sneeze.

Izuku frowned.  He reached up to touch his forehead with the back of his hand.  It was a meaningless action: his hand was cold, and he couldn't feel temperature either way.

"I told you not to stay when it rained the other day."

"I wanted those acorn squashes," Katsuki retorted.  He wiped at his runny nose.  "The hag likes them for decorations."

Izuku made sure he was fully covered by the blankets.  "And you're a good son for it."

Katsuki scoffed at the comment.

"But you won't do any good to anyone being sick."

"I'll be fine."

"You'll go back in the morning, right?"

Katsuki huffed and nodded.  "I'll go back."

"And stay there."

"What?  Why?"

Izuku fixed him with a serious expression.  "What if it keeps snowing?  What if your cold gets worse?"

"Izuku, I don't—"

"I will be here," izuku assured.  "Katchan, I'm not going anywhere."

Katsuki sighed and nodded.  "I know," he said softly.  "Fine, I'll stay in the hollow if it gets bad."

Izuku smiled again.  "Thank you, Katchan."

Katsuki shrugged.  Izuku leaned in and they shared a kiss.  Moments more, and Izuku had gotten under the blankets.

Their intimacy was slow and soft.  It was the only time Izuku's body felt warm: when he was opening up for Katsuki.  Which was good in the long run for how long their bodies stayed in contact after they finished.  Izuku lazed on top of Katsuki, nuzzling into his chest as he waited for him to be able to move.

When they could finally separate, Katsuki put his clothes back on.  He would have loved to stay with him so close for longer, but Izuku's heat had faded, and there was no sense in him getting sicker.

Katsuki put more wood on the fire before tucking back into the blankets.  He gave a loud sneeze before yawning.

"You should get some rest," Izuku said.

Katsuki grumbled.

"You need it," Izuku went on.  "There's nothing more to do until the morning."

Katsuki grunted but laid down on his side, facing the fire.  Izuku put another blanket on him before sitting next to him.  He lifted his head and put it in his lap.   Katsuki nuzzled his thigh as Izuku petted through his fur.

"Only for a bit," he said.  "Don't let me sleep too long."

Izuku nodded.  "Of course."

Without another exchange, Katsuki closed his eyes.  He was still cold despite the layers on him.  He thought Izuku might be right; maybe he should have gone back to the hollow.  But as the wind howled outside, it reassured him he had done the right things.

Katsuki knew he was shivering as he drifted off into slumber, but it wasn't all too concerning for him.  He had been cold plenty of times in the hollow during harsh winters.  He just had to get through the night.

When he awoke, something was different.  As he opened his eyes, he found something... off.  Like the floor had shifted or the light wasn't right.  The air was hanging as if it had been stilled.  However, when he looked closer, dust still played in the air.

Light came from corners where it shouldn't have.  It was heavy to move at first, but as he sat up, it got lighter.  Almost weightless.

He jutted forward when there was a sudden push on his back.  Arms came around him, and a face buried in his neck.  He thought he felt moisture, but it was more... a memory of moisture.

"Katchan."  The name was said through a sob.  "Katchan, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..."

Katsuki found it hard to turn with how Izuku was holding him.  He tried to get a better look at him, but still found it impossible.

"What's happening?" Katsuki asked.  "Why are you crying, you stupid sheep?"

"I didn't mean to."  Izuku's words barely came through his sobs.  "By the time I noticed..."

Katsuki scrunched his snout.  Noticed what?  The only thing he could focus on was Izuku's body heat.

The warmth he hadn't felt in years outside intimacy.

Something was wrong.  Something wasn't right about any of this.  Katsuki didn't feel cold anymore, but he could see the snow still falling through the small window.  Why wasn't it cold?  And where was all the light coming from?

Katsuki struggled against him again.  Izuku grunted as he pushed him away.

"Katchan, wait, just one—"

The both stopped as Katsuki's eyes fell to the floor.  Time almost halted as neither of them moved.

"I... I don't understand."

Slowly Katsuki looked to Izuku, searching for an answer.

Izuku sat close to him again.  He wrapped his arms around his shoulders and nuzzled his neck.

"It was like that for me, too," he said.  "I heard everyone making a commotion, and I was trying to figure out what was going on, and then I saw..."

The both look at the lifeless form.  Katsuki had no idea what to believe.

"When... when did you know...?"

"When I say my body, I guess."

Katsuki shook his head.  "No, this can't be..."

"I-I'm sorry."

Katsuki growled as he turned to him.  "Why are you apologising?"

Izuku winced.  "I should have woken you up."

Katsuki glanced back at his body.  "What happened?"

"I think the temperature dropped again."

"Think?"

"It's not like I can feel it."

"Right."

Izuku nuzzled him again.  "When I realised you weren't breathing, I tried waking you up."  He sighed.  "But it was already too late..."

Katsuki furrowed his brow.  "...you did try, right?"

Izuku pulled away, his brow furrowed.  "Of course I did!  Why would you ask that!?"

Katsuki shook his head.  "No, you're right, I..."  He ran a hand over his face.  "I don't know how I'm supposed to handle this."

"You could cry."

Katsuki rolled his eyes.  "Not much point in that."

Izuku shrugged.  "I cried for like... a week."

Katsuki raised a brow.  "So long?  Why?"

"Because I thought I wasn't going to see you or my mother again."

Katsuki considered this.  He stared at the dead fire and narrowed his gaze.  "Fuck.  The old hag..."

"She'll miss you."

"Yeah, yeah."

"You'll miss her."

"...yeah."

Izuku ran a hand through the fur of the cold wolf.  "I hope they find you soon."

"At least it's cold."

Izuku chuckled at that.  "At least..."

They were quiet for a moment.

"I'm glad it was here," Katsuki broke the silence.

"What do you mean?"

Katsuki stood up and glanced around.  "You're stuck here, right?"  He reached for the door handle, but found it did nothing when he went to turn it.  "In the field?"

Izuku nodded.  He stayed with his body as he watched him trying to be physical with the door.

"I guess since I died here," he offered.  "Though, sometimes I wonder if it's because of how important this place was to me."

"So maybe I'd always have come here."  Katsuki decided to forego habit and just tried at putting hand through the door.  He had much better luck with this.

"It's possible."  Izuku followed him outside of the hut.

The snow had gathered more over the night.  It was beyond their knees, but they had no troubles as they walked atop it.

"Still better it's here," Katsuki said.  His eyes were on the hibernating apple tree.  "I wouldn't want to chance it."

"Chance what?" Izuku asked as he came to stand beside Katsuki.

"Not being with you."

Izuku laughed.  "Somehow, I think you'd find a way back here."

Katsuki chortled.  "You're probably right."

He reached out and took his hand.  Izuku laced their fingers together and squeezed.

The wind picked up again, but neither felt the chill of it.  They sat down together, close now than they had ever been in life.  With the snow blowing around them, they spoke to each other, unhindered by time and consequence.

Together, they talked about spring and watching their trees bloom.

[cosmosogler]

hi guys! it was 8:30 just a few minutes ago, but now it is just past 10!!!

i had a lot of trouble getting up at 7 this morning since i lingered awake for quite a while after “going to bed.” so i slept in until 7:30. it wasn’t a problem. 

class was fine. the professor kept talking about how hard the class is and how fast it will move but we only did the syllabus today? i think it might be because 6 out of 16 of us were missing due to the eclipse. a whole bunch of us drove out to south carolina to see the total eclipse i guess. i met a bunch of people today. like, a whole bunch.

except one older student’s pants fell down and he wasn’t wearing any underwear... i couldn’t believe what i was seeing. i don’t know if that was real. i told him his pants had fallen down but i wasn’t looking when his friends mentioned something about it afterward. 

that made me real uncomfortable for the rest of the day. but the eclipse was awesome!!! i talked to a bunch of professors, and looked at it through the lenses and the shadow boxes and the cameras over and over again. it got darker and cooler and the sun looked like a little orange peel. i made a lot of dumb jokes but they felt like i was actually goofing around instead of being a tryhard, at least to me.

i got rocked in smash bros by keegan, and i hung out with harrison for like two hours in the food court when we went to look for a snack since my guac had gone kinda bad before its expiration date. there weren’t any snacks in there but we talked about quantum mechanics and supersymmetry so that was good instead. 

i went in the lgbt office to find an event calendar when i realized that harrison was from like the South south and he may have been kind of staring at me. but then i realized i didn’t really have any stakes in a friendship with him right now and i just didn’t have the energy to care. he didn’t seem too bothered about it when we were talking about physics afterward at least. we talked about anxiety stuff too. and didn’t look at each other very much. 

i dunno. the long term effects of grabbing the quietest colleague in the room and getting food might not be good, because it never is. never. but i did it anyway because i just needed to talk to someone, you know? anyone. i wanted to talk about the eclipse so i grabbed an interested party and talked about the goddang eclipse with him for two hours. then i came home and made some goddang teriyaki noodles.

i also set up my appointment with the counseling center for next week, and i called disability to check on my paperwork there. and i sent out snoopy’s rabies certification stuff to get the tag for her collar that she won’t wear.

it’s almost a relief to have found physics majors that i actively dislike. like this isn’t too good to be true, it’s just another place with some people i like and people i mostly dislike. ok i have mostly liked them so far, but this guy was driving me kinda nuts. he seemed like he was reaching the end of his grad program so i didn’t feel comfortable asking him to cut out being such an asshole about his students, and i also didn’t feel comfortable making a snide comment about how i like all my students (i actually don’t, but it was also really hard to reprimand the group of cheaters i had to deal with and this guy talked about wanting to consistently fail half the students in every class he taught because they were ‘retarded’).

i spent the evening (the last four and a half hours) mostly chilling out and doing nothing too productive... i finished episode 39 of the adventure zone but i didn’t pick up another episode after that or i’d just be finishing up now. i need to take snoopy to the clinic tomorrow morning or afternoon. that doesn’t leave a lot of time for me to check out the physics department to try to mooch the mechanics textbook off one of my classmates so i can take some notes before wednesday. my book won’t come in until next week. i won’t miss any homework but i really don’t want to start out even more behind.

i love solar eclipses though. this was the most intense one i’ve ever experienced. like it actually got way darker and shadows got all screwy. everyone was casting shadows with their hands and looking at the weird bulb crescents that had “grown” on our hand shadows. that’s how my brain felt about it at least. like there was an invisible thing that had appeared on my hand that was blocking out the sun between my fingers. but it was actually the moon blocking out the sun!!!

not really in the mood to sleep. i’ve been having bad dreams, as you might have read the last few days. last night wasn’t any better. i woke up with my shirt bunched under my arms from flailing around all night and it was kind of painful. i also woke up a couple times at what seemed to be just before sunrise. i don’t have any clocks i can easily access from my bed. checking the time when i can’t sleep just makes me anxious so i don’t if it’s still dark.

filling out the paperwork for my therapy appointment made me kind of sad. i feel like i’ve been doing this for like seven years now and i haven’t made any progress. i guess you could say i have made progress, if you weren’t me and you were looking at me, but i just feel like... i look at the numbers and the severities i was filling out and the numbers aren’t different. i don’t know if that’s because the meanings of the numbers change over time as i get more context for what an “8/10 depression” means or if i am still just as depressed as ever. feels like both honestly.

i’m so angry about my family. i can feel it leaking out during my conversations with my new classmates. it would probably be better if i didn’t say anything but the angry part of me wants other people to know that i’m angry. 

i joked to taylor that complaining is my favorite activity. it’s my favorite because i’m miserable all the time and i want everyone around me to be miserable. he said “yeah but that’s a real thing” and i had to stand there for a minute and remember oh yeah, that IS a real thing. i didn’t really have anything to say about that. i don’t actually want everyone around me to be miserable, at least not consciously, but i wasn’t sure how to say that in a believable way so i let someone else make another joke to change the subject.

anyway now it’s 10:30 so i’ll have to do some very last minute syllabus stuff ha ha ha procrastination strikes again. it’ll take five minutes. i’m sad that i didn’t take five minutes to do it earlier though.